Iberian Border Patrol Hup

ACKL Power Rankings Round 2

2010-11-07T17:43:00.001-05:00

Well the ACKL is off to a bang and the start of the year has brought us a full 10 GM's showing up to play the game this year. As per the norm we have a couple of usual names at the top of our list and a couple of new surprises that this year has brought. One thing that has been learnt, is that anything you thought you knew last year is worthless and that any constant surprises have been mitigated by yet again another year of bad coaching. But alas if you own Chris Bosh you now have a guy who gets 15 and 6... ummm, don't worry Jason Thompson wins the award with his 5 and 5... Yup another year where nothing makes sense and the 3 time defending champion looks like he'll go four time. So let's get down to business.

1. Skittles and Roses (1)

After a crushing defeat of last year's finalist, he is having a bit more of a difficult week with some mysterious listeria infection. But nothing to worry continues to be smooth sailing with little injuries.

2. Kingscourt Jester (3)

Team is playing like it is possessed at having another fantastic season, the hope is this will continue and at the moment it looks like. Now will someone tell Gay that he got paid last season and he can relax again.

3. Gucci's Gangster (6)

Looks to be a force to be reckoned with this year. Griffin looks solid and the rest of his squad has the highest of fashion senses going into the year. Has easily taken care of business in the first two weeks and ran over Kahn's team in week one. Watchout for the hitman squad.

4. Halifax Rainman (7)

Last time I called them team Old, but alas after two weeks I have to give some respect, has been playing teams really tough and making everyone realize that he will try to contend. Good victory over the meat the last week and another solid performance this week.

5. The Khan Artists (2)

Hasn't found the traction yet in the new season. Has got players doing their thing, and others wondering if they will do there thing this year. Plenty of time in the year to be right in the thicket and watch things grow, but at the moment it is a team going backwards.

6. Indian Burial Curse (4)

Another team going backwards, though making multiple moves to try and fix it, but draft circa 2010 has been a disaster from beginning to end. Will he find the components to make things work, and will the injury bug stop biting all his players one by one.

7. Mystery Meat (5)

The GM is back and the squad is off to a slow start. D12 being one of the slowest of them all in terms of rebounds and such. But give it some time and patience and he could be a very feared team at the end of the year.

8.Broken Ankle Rehab (8)

Good win the first week, then ran into an angry GM the second week, finding himself on the losing end as his team just doesn't have the depth and raw talent up top to make it work yet, but a more competitive squad than it was last year with the addition of Wall.

9. Future Dunk (9)

The rebuilding seems to be working, good talent has been found, it is just going to be a long long year in the end. Though the schedule can only get easier from here on out.

10. OCT (10)

The team should be used to being in this spot, cause it looks very unlikely that it will be moving anytime soon. Something about having Hibbert as your 5th best player tells you that something may be wrong. Patience and making sure to get value out of the older guys to rebuild is the major goal here.

ACKL Power Rankings 2010-11 1st Edition

2010-10-24T18:26:00.000-05:00

Greetings, the season is near, I've just finished watching all of season 2 of Jersey Shore in 2 days and figure that the nightmare of my life is finally over... yes watching that show more than once a week would drive most people insane, watching it in 2 days has given me a new appreciation for the lack of sophistication in Canadian girls until it comes time to do the deed in which they fake bunt and get out of sight. Anyways this has inspired me a tad, well enough for me to relate to the power rankings, only so that I get my sanity back. So without further ado, let us go over the numbers.

1st Edition (Pre-season week)

The Contenders

Yes winning the league and being on top of the league is the same as being able to show you can do a good jersey shore fist pump dance, and well I just enjoy watching this on repeat and wondering if this is their exercise for the day or not. But alas last year our champ Carlos fist pumped his way to victory and after a good draft for him, he is ready to lead everyone to the MVP promise land.

1. Skittles and Roses (Carlos)

Best team out there on paper, can't beat his top 8 when they are put together, and his depth is enough that he is again looking like the winner of the league. One day the trading away high draft picks will get to him, but for now we might as well just put his name on the trophy again.

2. The Khan Artists (Mike)

Had the most draft picks, had the best draft, and again has the deepest team around, his talent is getting better with age and if he can hijack a superstar and not lose much depth he will be on top of Carlos like Snookie was on top of Vinny that one night.

3. Kingscourt Jester (Dustin)

Good draft, though if Phoenix has learnt any thing in the preseason, Robin Lopez and Hedo at the 4 and 5 is a defensive disaster. Has the Wade injury to watch out for the moment, but in the end looks ready to put together another solid season as long as the geriatrics unit stays away.

4. Indian Burial Curse (Kyle)

Where to start, has a 24 minute keeper in Ming, has another keeper that might get some minutes (Thompson), but it buried in Sac town, because other GM's can't draft properly(Khan). So is now stuck in a rut that he can't get out of. Can't count him out with the likes of LBJ and Deron, but hasn't thrilled either, going to be based on what he achieves early in the season in returns for players he drafts.

The Unknown Quantity

For a few years now one man has defied us that studying in the league does not breed a winning team, and that not studying also does not allow you to win. So basically he tries, he fails, he doesn't try he fails. So instead he goes to sleep and we one day wait for Cinderella to wake him up.

5. Mystery Meat (Joe)

As the name states, he is a mystery, got talent at the top, could move himself up, but does he wake up. Only time will tell, but I will say this, Dwight Howard will be his best player this year.

Gasping at the price

For some GM's they are stuck looking at the prize and cringing, now that prize may be a red thong, or it may be a silver plattered trophy, but none the less they are again stuck in no man's land, watching and waiting. A lot like Sammi's and Ron's relationship, if is going forward, backwards, upwards, downwards... or are they just stuck. Time will tell.

6. Gucci's Gangster (Near)

Team is becoming younger and hasn't made any silly trades this year, being patient with Blake, and that will hopefully turn into a marriage made in heaven. Needs to continuing building up, and in a couple years time could be something to reckon with.

7. Halifax Rainman (Scott)

Team Old, really it is on life support this year. Can't see much coming out of it, and sooner or later the big blow up will occur... I suspect trading deadline this year, but not much to watch and see, what you have is what you get. A team that would scare me if we were back in circa 2003.

Running from the Prize

Now the Snookie run in repeat is funny, yet scary on too many levels. First off watching her run in fluffy shoes is good way to crack me up. While using one arm to keep her moving along. While wearing ridiculous glasses that she can barely see out of. She's a train wreck, and is a lot like the last 3 teams. All teams are rebuilding in some format, but for this year, they will be spending time counting how many times Snookie's funbags bounce in this clip.

8.Broken Ankle Rehab (Eli)

Best of the worst at the moment, needs to be careful though, has to watch which of his picks run, and which don't and make changes quick. But having Granger, makes him a bigger beast to beat up on.

9. Future Dunk (Jason)

He's like a grenade, full of young raw talent, but you stay away to find something better. A finer more likable individual comes around. For now he's in the bottom, but rebuilding will be hard and slow, just has to make sure he doesn't pull an Angelina and whore himself to all the other franchises.

10. OCT (Cousy)

We have a SITUATION... yes you knew it was coming, but we do. The team is like the SITUATION, can be nice and endearing at times, but also can explode all over you and just throw you out the room rather than being a team player. That's what this squad is, an interesting mess, a team in two directions... look for the franchise players to move this year in order to try redeem as many top picks as possible in the coming drafts.

Now that's a wrap... just make sure it was shrink wrapped, I saw those herpes on the beach in Miami.

p.s. the power rankings won't be this long again.

ACKL Fantasy Draft Rankings

2010-08-21T16:50:00.000-05:00

After enjoy a week in the Iberian border I've come back to reality and that means looking at the basketball draft and ranking how each team. This is much like my vacation as the photo nicely depicts.

Yes we find the draft a thing of fire and smoke that litters our preception on how well we may have done. I will attempt to take an unbiased opinion and say how I see the draft planning out for all and giving everyone grades that only a fine talent recruiter like Isiah Thomas could find.

Without further ado, in an alphabetical order in order to not entice people thinking I am bias other than the first letter in your name. Let the ranking and fun begin.

Anthony: 6: Chris Kaman (If only it was Deron), 15: Eric Gordon, 26: Jameer Nelson, 27: Hedo Turkoglu, 35: James Harden, 55: Tayshawn Prince, 66: Anthony Tolliver

- Had himself a solid draft, excellent pieces picking up with a good youth piece in Gordon and excellent rebounder with Kaman. Nelson and Turkoglu were both cheaper due to the fact they had bad years and should bounce back next year, especially with Hedo now out of Toronto and in the steady hands of Nash and co. Harden will need to look to get minutes in a talented team but is a good piece to gamble on. Not sold on his last two picks with Prince and Tolliver as minutes will be hard to find for both members.

Ranking: B

Carlos: 4: DeMarcus Cousins, 24: JJ Hickson, 34: Terrence Williams, 37: Mike Miller, 46: AK47, 49: Jose Calderon, 67: Ramon Sessions

- Being the defending 3 time champ he is afford to gamble in drafts. He has never won in the drafts and this may have been best draft yet for him, sadly it still needs some work, but his trading ability will make it easy for him to move pieces and find the talent to win again. That being said he went for youth early on, and to be honest I think that was too high for Cousins, but if he is willing to wait it out and keep him then he'll be good to go. Hickson was a good pick at that spot. Williams and Miller are both interesting picks, both have high potential, but also can easily collapse and show nothing. AK47 will give you stats when health, Calderon pick is my favorite of his as it can at a wonderful spot to get a guy who has had potential keeper ability when he plays well. Ramon Noodles is a gamble and will test his itchy trigger finger when he doesn't get playing time early on in the season behind Mo Williams

Rating: C+

Cousy: 1: Evan Turner, 21: Jason Richardson, 29: Emeka Okafor, 40: Amir Johnson, 41: Beno Udrih, 60: Kirk Hinrich, 61: Shaq

- First surprise of the draft was brought by Cousy when he choose Turner over Wall, I understand the reasonings behind it, but still have to say Wall was the more consensus choice in my mind, star PG's are hard to find, while SG/SF can be a dime a dozen. He made up for it with excellent picks with Richardson and Okafor which will be keepers for him for a few years to come. Amir will get minutes in Toronto and hopefully stats come with it. Beno is a safe pick at PG and will hope to get over his injury concerns of last year. Kirk pick is a strange pick as he is backing up Wall and Arenas, but I like the Shaq pick especially at the start of the season with the injury to Perkins.

Rating: A-

Dustin: 10: Devin Harris, 11: Raymond Felton, 30: Robin Lopez, 50: Shawn Marion, 64: Leandro Barbosa, 69: Rodrigue Beaubois, 70: Nicholas Batum

- Had a superb start to the draft and picked up the two best PG's on the board not named Wall. Both have run and gun type teams and each have added firepower to make themselves even better. Then the Robin Lopez pick came along and I spent hours mystifying why, I know no Center in Phoenix, but clearly small ball is going to be played with that squad and Frye will be playing the 5 spot. Marion and Barbosa are both meh picks, could get the stats, could just float around looking google eyed. Finished off the draft strong with two quality sleepers in Beaubois and Batum.

Rating: B-

Eli: 2: John Wall, 19: Brendan Haywood, 22: JaVale McGee, 39: Tiago Splitter, 42: Boris Diaw, 59: DeMar DeRozan, 62: Ed Davis

- Had the gem of the draft fall one pick to two and you couldn't pass up on having a potential franchise keeper on your squad. He then went on to pick Haywood and McGee to continue to load his front court and get more rebounds then he did last year. Took the sleeper pick with Splitter who has potential to be the starting center in SA. Diaw will put up usual numbers and has an ability to do all the small stats that you look for. The last two picks are diamonds in the rough and shows you his allegiance to the Raptors. They could work out, but more often than not you will find them in the scrap heap.

Rating: B+

Herndu: 5: Anthony Morrow, 16: Samuel Dalembert, 25: Al Harrington, 36: Elton Brand, 45: Thaddeus Young, 56: Courtney Lee, 65: Mike Bibby

- This is what happens when you don't attend a draft. You end up with Morrow and Dalembert as your top picks. He saved himself with Harrington and a fit Brand. Young and Lee will not help Herndu and nor will Bibby. Though due to his inactivity as an owner it should come no surprise that most of those players will not end up playing anyways on his roster. So really no harm no foul correct.

Rating: F

Jason: 7: Wesley Johnson, 9: Luis Scola, 17: Carl Landry, 31: Andersen Varejao, 44: Greg Monroe, 54: Jarrett Jack, 57: Drew Gooden

- Went on a youth spree, which is exactly what Jason's team needed. Found himself with Johnson early on, and then went on a spree of PF, in Scola, Landry and Varejao, all who could put up solid rebound numbers and be good glue for the team. Monroe has the potential to do well, with Jack and Gooden doing well in supporting roles. Needs to find a franchise player for his squad and continue to rebuild this year and make moves for higher picks after the Dirk trade.

Rating: B+

Kyle: 12: Stephen Jackson, 18: Marcus Thornton, 32: Reggie Williams, 47: Serge Ibaka, 51: Mike Conley Jr, 52: Richard Hamilton, 53: Ronnie Brewer

- Very good early draft Kyle had, taking Jackson at 12 and picking up Thornton at 18 were superb picks. Took a surprise head scratching pick at 32 with Williams, but if Nelson stays and he gets the SF spot like projected he could end up putting some deadly stats. Ibaka will be the shot blocker and has made himself known as a defensive presence. Conley pick is a joke, bad idea, but a PG was needed and Calderon had just been taken. Hamilton will be good if he gets the minutes in Detroit, or gets traded to someone with a SG need. Brewer is excellent for steals and will be helping Chicago out this year with their defensive presence and mad hops.

Rating: B

Mike: 8: Derrick Favors, 13: Antawn Jamison, 14: Andray Blatche, 20: Trevor Ariza, 28: Al-Farouq Aminu, 33: Josh Childress, 48: Ben Gordon, 68: Lou Williams

- Mike has been continuing the building trend over the last years and has grown to be one of the most competitive teams in the league. He did it again with this draft, as he was able to score Favors, Jamison, Blatche in the top 14. He stretched with Ariza and then selected a Clipper with the Aminu pick, while he rebounding numbers have been crazy in college it was probably a little early on that pick. Childress should do well in Phoenix, but who knows what the Euro diet may have done to him. Gordon will look to have a bounce back year with the Pistons and Williams will fight with Holiday and Turner for playing time.

Rating: A

Scott: 3: Andre Miller, 23: John Salmons, 38: JR Smith, 43: Kelenna Azubuike, 58: George Hill, 63: Josh Howard

- Scott has a great draft if you pretend not to look at that first pick he made. Andre Miller pick was a shocking surprise and did not conform with any of the early predictions, especially with PG's like Felton and Harris who put up better numbers throughout the year. Here is hoping he has 50 point games once a week to prove me wrong. Salmons and Azubuike picks were excellent steals in there places. Smith will help and Hill and Howard both have potential to put up strong numbers.

Rating: B-

Overall this was the best drafted draft yet of the league. GM's have learnt how to better evaluate talent and less and less potential disasters were made in the draft. Rather than becoming like Isiah Thomas, we now see more of a Sam Presti and Daryl Morey way about going about the drafting. Now the wait for the season which is now only 2 months away.

ACKL 2010 Draft

2010-08-04T08:12:00.000-05:00

<a href="http://www.coveritlive.com/mobile.php/option=com_mobile/task=viewaltcast/altcast_code=24ca47711e" >ACKL 2010 Draft</a>

Let the drafting mayhem begin, who will pick what and will it shake down like a 1980's frat party.

ACKL Finals Day 2... the breakdown

2010-04-07T06:46:00.000-05:00

The experiement continues yet for another day, seeing how close those average stats are and whether I can find that advantage to finally win a bloody title. Yes I know i shouldn't be worried about the fantasy world, but once a year I worry. So without further ado, I will just list the expected results tonight in the table. Plus provide a bit of a break down of what I see.

Matchup numbers Night 2(predicted)

Category	Kobe(pred)	actual	HH(pred)	actual
3PTM	5.0		15.5
PTS	173.2		182.4
OREB	13.6		11.1
REB	48		49.9
ASTS	38.7		46.3
STLS	6.3		9.6
BLKS	7.8		4.4
TO	27.0		22.3

So after the first night in which I took a good advantage in points that I'll need to hold onto for the rest of the week, we've got a very tight battle tonight in al categories minus 3PTS and Blocks, which we each take one category handily. So should be up for an interesting points/assists/rebound matchup. All those big stats that we all like to calculate to see how well our teams are playing. As long as I don't end up like this, I'll be happy.

ACKL Finals... Day 1 Pre-Breakdown

2010-04-05T14:15:00.011-05:00

The finals are upon me once again in the wonderful fantasy format of sports. Now I know most won't be interested, but I wanted to break down the fantasy numbers pre-day and then post day to see how well the average predictors are, and whether or not you can find an actually statistical advantage from it all or not.

So how I'm going to break it down, I'm going to forget percentages... that's a crap shoot stat that I don't have time to try figure out as the week is going, I'm worried about the other 8 categories that go on in my fantasy format, I'm going to tally each person's starting roster for that day, and make a prediction based on last week's average stats... I could go monthly, but I've chosen to use the nearest stat and too see how far off some players are, in terms of hot and cold streaks. Anyways just something to scare those that wish to look at the stats.

Day 1
HH Roster 3 PTM PTS OREB REB AST STLS BLKS TO
- Stephen Curry: 2.3 19.7 1.0 4.7 9.3 1.3 0.7 3.7
- Andre Iguodala: 2.3 22.7 1.0 7.0 7.7 3.0 0.7 4.0
- Deron Williams: 2.0 17.0 0.0 2.3 14.3 1.0 0.7 3.3
- Lebron James: 0.3 30.7 0.7 9.7 7.3 1.3 0.7 3.0
-Gerald Wallace: 0.5 15.0 1.8 9.0 2.3 0.8 0.5 1.8
- Antawn Jamison: 1.3 13.3 1.0 9.7 1.3 0.7 0.7 1.0
- Luis Scola: 0.0 18.8 2.5 8.0 2.3 1.3 0.3 2.3
- Jason Thompson:0.0 17.0 2.3 7.3. 0.7 0.3 1.3 1.7
- John Salmons: 1.8 19.8 1.0 3.8 4.8 1.0 0.3 2.0

Kobe's Lineup
- Jrue Holiday: 1.0 15.0 0.3 2.3 5.7 1.0 0.0 4.0
- Chase Budinger: 3.0 19.3 0.8 4.5 2.0 0.3 0.3 0.3
- Taj Gibson: 0.0 14.0 5.7 13.7 1.0 0.7 2.3 1.0
- Joakim Noah: 0.0 11.0 4.0 11.3 2.7 0.3 1.3 0.7
- J.J. Hickson: 0.0 12.0 4.0 11.0 1.7 0.3 1.7 1.3
- Andray Blatche: 0.0 23.0 3.3 8.3 6.8 2.8 1.0 2.8
-H-heem Thabeet:0.0 1.7 1.7 6.7 0.3 0.3 2.3 1.7
- Paul Millsap: 0.0 13.7 3.0 9.0 2.7 0.7 1.7 1.7
- Shaun Livingston: 0.0 12.0 0.5 3.3 5.3 0.0 0.8 2.5

Matchup numbers(predicted)

Category	Kobe(pred)	actual	HH(pred)	actual
3PTM	4.0	2	10.5	11
PTS	121.7	103	174	198
OREB	24.4	12	11.3	7
REB	70.1	52	61.5	37
ASTS	28.2	26	50	41
STLS	6.7	4	10.7	4
BLKS	11.4	9	5.2	3
TO	16.0	11	22.8	10

So after night one the matchup should be 4-4, and then add percentages in there, which usually gets split, so after night one the matchup should be 5-5. Not much to seperate both squads, and really should make for an entertaining continuation on the week. I'll update it hopefully tomorrow after the actual results come in and we can see how widely off the predicted stats are.

Deron and Kyle Throw Balls

2009-09-01T23:19:00.005-05:00

So the summer this year has been epically slow in terms of anything really NBA news related that didn't involve David Lee, Ricky Rubio, Ramon Sessions and Brandon Jennings thinking he is the best point guard ever.

Apparently in mormon state Utah is where all the action is going to be at come September, and it ain't basketball we will be watching, nope it will be a dodgeball tourney featuring Deron Williams and Kyle Korver. This is a charity even raising money for a worthy cause and in an attempt to drum up support Kyle and Deron have made some videos to get people to sign up. I've posted the three below, the first one is my personal favourite.

Notice the 50% Boozer jersey's on sale in the background.

Video #2

Video #3

So sign up for some dodgeball, cause well that's all I want to play now after watching the videos... and some corn. Corn, Dodgeball and a Boozer jersey, yup the good life.

Oh and if you are bored... Bill Simmons twitter feed is rather amazing to read every so often.

Video: Boston Goals

2009-08-27T00:23:00.002-05:00

Boston Goals

Sometimes I'm reminded back of the university life, and living with a roommate who is a die hard soccer fan and was brilliant at finding great little soccer videos. Anyways below you'll find the fictional team called Boston Goals who's highlights are being shown from their latest game. The two commentators remind me of university hecklers who are busy trying to out do one another and then end it with a friendship moment... do I hear KEG-GER!!!

Picturesque Shaq Style

2009-08-26T23:33:00.004-05:00

Shaquille O'Neal brings new meaning to being scared for life. Take that pink speedo... BOOMSHAQALAQUA!!!

I do hope some fan puts a sign up of him in his speedo at a game next year.

Never released book titles part 1

2009-08-25T21:35:00.002-05:00

Some guys just want a chance, and for those we salute you today with this new book title about a man who got a chance to play in the NBA and showed that even if you can't rebound you can still play for the Toronto Raptors, Utah Jazz and Philadelphia 76'ers.

Schumacher to the rescue

2007-12-12T19:35:00.000-05:00

Oh leave it to Michael Schumacher to get me out of my daze of exams and into a blogging mood. Apparently my comatose state can now be called officially over, and you ask why would this be the case. Well simple Schumacher commandeered his own taxi and drove it down the autobahn in record minivan taxi speed.

So the full story about Schumacher is as follows, apparently he went to go pick up a dog an Australian Shepherd, and once he had picked up the dog with his wife and two children he noticed that they were a little late getting back to the airfield for their flight home. Well in doing so el master driver, politely asked the cab driver if he could drive the vehicle, which the cab driver readily agreed too, and Schumacher drove down the autobahn in a minivan, clocking just about 160km per hour and according to the drive making passes that only he wished he could make and kept the peddle to the metal even around corners.

So which begs the question... with Schumacher in retirement, isn't there a bunch of jobs he could take over and save countless lives, or time for other individuals... could you see the money he could make on the autobahn driving people safely to there destination as quickly as possible, or what about these following sources of employment.

5. Firetruck Driver: A big red truck, sure he has never raced trucks before, nor has he ever entered into any NASCAR truck series, but I figure he can learn quickly and be able to put that lack of a turning radius in the truck to go use.
4. The Organ Donor Driver: Yes I know that this gets flown in and such, but sometimes it gets driven from hospital to hospital, and who better at making sure a timely delivery occurs other than Schumacher... though currently Lewis Hamilton is giving him a run for his money.
3. The Fed Ex Delivery Man: Everyone needs to get there mail, and fed-ex does like to promise next morning delivery, or same day delivery for that matter, so you can replace all those bicycle delivery boys in Boston and replace them with Schumacher, he can do the job quicker and more efficiently then anyone else on the earth.
2. Pizza Delivery Boy: The smell of pizza comes to mind, you want it hot, you want it on time and you don't want to lose money because of late pizzas, so call in Michael, who can make all the right moves so that you can have a salami and cheese pizza.
1. Ambulance Driver: This is probably the best job for him, he can save lifes, and has good reflexes and find the holes through traffic to get to the hospital, as well, since he won't have as big of a vehicle unlike that firetruck he can make more use of the lights and horns and pretend that he is racing for the championship with the crowd cheering him on.

Bitch... oh wait you're white

2007-09-30T20:17:00.000-05:00

They say a picture tells a million words, but I don't think it's just a picture that tells a million words, a video tells just as many words and gets you to wonder whether people process or not what they actually say to the camera.

Isiah has perfectly portrayed what is known as racism... go figure it's black on black, but it's still racism whether you see it or not... especially when he says it's worse for a white man compared to a black man. I don't know if both sides aren't enjoying what's being said and can't laugh about it, then well maybe you should cut it out and not say it in front of them all the time. Isiah might do better if he called a male a bitch, I just want to see the results of whether or not he gets himself looking for that special bar of soap in prison or the fact he'll be buried 10 feet underground by the Serbian mafia (Darko has to be involved with them somehow, only reason he could possibly justify those comments he made about the Italians).

I will admit I have watched this trial from afar, and to me it's almost as entertaining as the OJ murder trial (if the glove does not fit you must acquit) or the Gold Club trial... yes we can all remember Patrick Ewing's wonderful testimony on receiving a lap dance or two. But yes, trials are great, though it's only a gigantic car wreck waiting to happen in this trial, especially for the likes of Isiah Thomas, James Dolan and the Knicks. Don't worry we will remember them for their wonderful basketball managerial skills, and not the fact that they fired someone, made leud sexual advances and the fact that Stephon Marbury managed to bang an intern or two.

Not sure how this will affect Stephon's season, I suspect for the better, for once he'll be able to play semi-reliable defense, you know since he did go on trial for the defense for once. In the end Marbury may have provided exactly what this trial needed, since the jury was falling asleep, he managed to mix his skills of being a lover of sex, and a man with great taste, yes the back of the vehicle always works well. In the end we can expect no less from the great organization that the Knicks have now become. Can't wait for jury deliberations to end next week and we can all see the debauchery of this trial, because it could have all been prevented if James Dolan had just thrown money at it.

Bing Bang Stick It In, Goodnight!!

2007-05-06T23:26:00.000-05:00

**Warning, Gruesome Photo Ahead**

That's enough of a warning, by gruesome I mean a slight injury to a nose, don't worry I'm not about to post Alan Smith breaking his leg for Manchester United back a year ago. So enough of that silly topic, let's hit up the hardwood.

Yes it's basketball playoffs, and to say it's great to watch on HDTV, I've decided it's the best sport to watch on that, mind you I haven't seen curling or for that matter football, but the shiny floor is just so mesmerizing to watch. *Reminder at times I have the brain of a monkey* Anyways I have a few favourite moments of the last 2 weeks of basketball bliss... and by the way it's been bliss, not as interesting as overtime in the NHL. But the Golden State versus Dallas series did enough to keep me distracted from hockey.

Which brings me to my new favorite picture of all time. I would like to congratulate Baron Davis for choosing to wear this ridiculous outfit before a game. Anyone who is able to wear a scarf and at the same time have bullets in his hat can now be my new favorite player *This does not mean that I will draft him in the 1st round of any basketball pool, a reminder to my friends on that front*.

By the way check out that playoff beard, it's very nice as Borat would say.

Moving on, talk about round 2. Even though it has already started, oh well, let's break it down.
Detroit versus Chicago: I've decided the Eastern Conference sucks until it gets to the conference finals. Chicago is good and all, but they are too young and too inexperienced to get the job down against a team that rarely loses it's composure when Rasheed Wallace is on the bench.
New Jersey versus Cleveland: So basically Lebron versus, Kidd-Jefferson-Carter. I have no interest in this series, mostly because I hate both cities, yes I've never visited, but if Charles Barkley can hate on Oakland, I can sure hate on Cleveland and New Jersey.
Golden State versus Utah: Ah the mormons made it through, now it's a game of low post versus 3 point shooting. Something says it will all depend on what type of tempo Golden State gets to play, get Utah to run and gun and the win, if not, well they might as well be happy they made the playoffs this year.
Phoenix versus San Antonio: Okay, so apparently it's okay to make someone bleed, check the below picture, if this series doesn't go to 7 games I will feel cheated, it's the best series to watch in the 2nd round, as long as you don't mind seeing a bunch of flopping. San Antonio makes Ronaldo look tame at diving, yes I'm looking at you Parker and Ginobli.

Steve Nash is right now thinking this means war Eva, invite me to your wedding already, I'm french enough living in Canada.

**SOCCER**
Congrats to PSV and Manchester for winning their respective league titles, yes PSV with a dramatic comeback victory from 3rd to 1st in the last day of competition, it was amazing stuff to witness.

**HOCKEY**
Just get ready for the Sabres versus Sens series, I'm just hoping a brawl breaks out in the first game between these two sides, both have a lot of hatred towards one another.

Playoffs and all

2007-04-23T22:30:00.000-05:00

Well while trying to recover from the stimulation of watching a sea turtle race. (just go to colbertnation and follow the link), I've noticed that it's playoff hockey and basketball time. Which means this is the best time of year for sports bar none. Cause as well football is starting to come to a close as well over the next couple of months as well (the non american variety).

So yes, I was tempted to blog about all the teams and so forth and give my predictions, but I've decided that having maggie the monkey beat me in a competition of predictions is not only uncool but also would be quite the burst to my ego. But alas let's look at the series in the NBA first quickly.

Detroit versus Orlando (Goliath versus David)
Simple Goliath wins, Orlando is a SG/actual PG away from being dominant, and if Darko every decided to wake up... which would be a first finally, then well he's wouldn't be the worst 2nd draft pick since Len Bias (was that cocaine reference too soon).

Chicago versus Miami (Youth versus Veteran)
Well after over paying for Ben Wallace, Chicago comes in with a deep rotation and a problem with not trading for Kevin Garnett, yup that's going to hunt them for a while. Miami on the other hand has a 50% Wade and a 100% immovable object in Shaq (by the way I'm just waiting for him to go all cop on Ben Wallace and tell him that he will arrest him for having a headband on)

Toronto versus New Jersey (The ex-sanity)
Yes that's about as good of a Vince Carter reference I can come up with. And I hate to say it, but Toronto is too young, no matter how many veteran European players are playing on your team. Toronto does not have the dominating Center, sorry Rasho, and New Jersey is just too veteran of a squad these days.

Cleveland versus Washington (Overpaid, No HIBACHI)
Need I say more, this series could have been great if Gerald Wallace didn't decide to fly through the air like he was in the cirque de soleil, and land on Arenas' leg. And if Caron Butler could convince the rim and backboard to be nicer to his hand next time, maybe we would have actually had a decent series... sadly we won't.

Dallas versus Golden State (Patch Beard versus Man Beard)
Yup Baron Davis has one sweat Beard, it's more dense then his hair, and to me that's hard to find in a good beard. It will be a tough series, and maybe Dirk will grow a playoff beard as well, to attempt to match and beat Baron Davis. I seriously would love to see Davis playing hockey right about now, he would fit right in.

Phoenix versus Kobe (Team versus One man show)
Need I say anything else about this. If Kobe can somehow pull this off I'll be impressed, the man though should have just manned up to Shaq back in the day and said he needed him to be able to win championships... maybe he doesn't want too. Maybe he really just wants to beat Wilt's 100 point night record. Either way Nash and the team philosophy of the Suns is usually too hard to handle.

San Antonio versus Denver (Balding versus 3 hour hair jobs)
Yes did anyone notice the hair of AI and Carmelo, like honestly, they are looking like twins. Maybe they both bought into the team philosophy together and as well enjoy manicures and pedicures together as well. On the other hand, someone should find a black paint can and spray the bald spot in Manu's head. It's terrible to watch on HD TV to be honest.

Houston versus Utah (The world versus the mormons)
Yup, I can't stay away from a mormon reference let's be honest. But then again when Houston has all of china behind them, with both Ming and McGrady (I know McGrady isn't chinese but his jersey sales would say otherwise in China). Also not that all of china is the world, but it's a lot bigger than mormon country is in Salt Lake. Again as long as neither of two bigs get injured for Houston, then it will be one tough series. Yes you thought I was going to predict now didn't you.

Anyways there's my small run down of the NBA playoffs.

I would like to remind everyone, that the Dutch Eredivise is very exciting right now with AZ, PSV and Ajax, all tied at the top of the table, with one game remaining and AZ holding the lead in goal differential. Yes I haven't see this happen in the Dutch league ever, or maybe I just didn't pay attention, all I know is there is going to be a lot of scoreboard watching next weekend to see who will win. I hope AZ does, they need to continue to build the history they have been putting together in the last few years and deserve it for their brilliant offensive soccer they have been playing.

Why soccer is the best

2007-04-14T21:45:00.000-05:00

Well coming from a northern climate and all, and living in Canada after all, myself saying soccer is the best is quite sac religious to be perfectly honest. I do realize I live in hockey country and I will admit hockey is a great sport and invokes passion in all of us, myself included. The thing is though it's a different passion, if Canada sucked at hockey and lost the series in 72, things would be mighty different (I swear Joe I never read that anywhere). But in fact we won that series and continue to flex our muscles in the NHL with close to 50% players coming from Canada, but not winning the gold medal very much at the Olympics. Actually we are the Brazil of hockey or I might dare say the Netherlands but since they never won I can't say we are like them. Mind you tiny yet mighty, but that is for a different discussion.

This discussion is to attempt to illustrate why soccer is better in my mind, I will not say better athletes, though some could argue, but then again that is comparing apples and oranges, all athletes are great, all sports are great, yes even figure skating and synchronize swimming takes a lot of skill. So we can already discard fighting about that theory.

Now let's look at the referees in the both games.... well the only good part is that their are no judges to irrational rate you based on the country you come from, and pull out marks that make no sense (diving, figure skating). Both games have at times terrible refereeing that decide games; hockey anytime the Maple Leafs are playing and in soccer I remind myself once daily about the Dutch versus Portugal game of this past world cup campaign. Again perfectly even.

So really, what it comes down to is soccer is the best purely on two aspects, the fact that soccer players are able to get themselves in a ton of trouble all the time in the most silly of ways, and secondly the fans have more passion and more lust for their team then any redneck who watches and follows NASCAR every week.

To illustrate this fact I will go over my top 10 moments of 2007 so far.

10. Fan rushes onto the pitch after Chelsea and Tottenham play in a FA Cup game on March 19. In this attempt to fan who is a Tottenham supporter attempts to take on the Chelsea team, specifically John Terry the captain of Chelsea. Not that I condone running onto the field to punch a rival team's star player, but well it's all about the passion of cheering for the home side. (on a side note; great job Sens fans, keep up the good work on Crosby)

9. Great goal celebration... I came across this a few weeks back, wait it was posted on deadspin, thank you deadspin without you soccer would not be seen by most USA web people and Jim Rome would have won the battle against soccer. But seriously does any other league have as good as celebrations as these guys do. (I will admit the CFL celebrations are great, and sometimes the NFL).

Personal favorite celebration is when the Celtic player dives to the ground, and then two parts it by getting up and walking around like a zombie. Honorable mentions: The Snorting of the touch line and the golf swing.

8. Well sure we have seen glass fall down during a game, or a rim break, but has anyone seen the stadium billboards get torn off onto the field and whack a few players. Again on in soccer and only in South Africa does this happen. This happened in January of this year. Suffice to say no one got seriously injured thankfully.

7.

Need I really say more here, a sculptor of Ronaldihno (Brazilian superstar) was made in the shape of a horse with his face inplanted into it. Then attempted to be sold on ebay for the cool price of 25000 dollars. Yes I'm waiting for the Sidney Crosby Titanic sculptor to come so, so I can start bidding.

6. Fans support is always looked for, and sometimes that fan goes the extra mile to get the job done. Take for example this fan named Isaac Juma from Kenya, who paints his body before every match into a traditional witch doctor look. While that isn't cool enough he even goes the extra mile as he is quoted telling the BBC as follows

"After being painted I stop talking to anybody, abstain from sex and do nothing to compromise my concentration until after the match
First of all, I have to buy my own paint, then pay the person to decorate me all over my body.

That is not to mention the barber who shaves me before I go to the field."

Yes that's right folks, he gets a barber to shave him before every match, he pays for everything himself to do it, and he also has no sex after getting painted until the match is over. I will always salute fans that go the extra mile to help ones team out... that being Kenya's national team that hasn't really done much lately alas.

5. Never get in the way of drunken soccer fans... especially when they are rival soccer fans and are looking for some reason to fight. You just may lose a body part of two. Or that's what happened to a poor bartender who tried to break up a fight between Bulgarian fans throwing pro-Turkish remarks to a bunch of Greek fans.

I tried to split them up and ended up on the floor with one of the Bulgarians biting one ear and another one chewing the other ear off," Tsibibakis told state television on Wednesday from hospital. "I need to have plastic surgery. Doctors told me they cannot just stitch them back on," Tsibibakis said. "At least I still have the pieces that were bitten off.

Ah yes, the thought of Mike Tyson being there would have made this story so much more perfect, but alas maybe Dracula does live on in all of us after all.

4. Well you know what they say, always check to make sure your tattoo artist is a fan of your team before going to him to put your team's logo on your back. Maybe it would have been better if he branded himself somewhere else. You ask what happened. Well nothing like going to Argentina and attempting to get the Boca Juniors (big club in Argentina) tattooed into your back.

I'll let the news excerpt quote what happened exactly

A tattoo artist from Argentina is facing a lawsuit after drawing a penis on the back of an Argentinean football fan instead of his favorite team's official logo. Reports said the teenager approached the tattoo artist and asked him to tattoo the logo of the Boca Junior football team on his back. However, the tattooist was an avid supporter of the rival team (River Plate) and decided to play a prank on his young customer. After reaching home, the victim proudly showed his parents his new tattoo and was surprised to learn that a penis was tattooed on his back.

Ah the wonderful feeling of walking around with a tattoo of a penis in your back.

3. I've always hated the Czechs, mostly because Holland usually had to play them to qualify for the world cup, or euro, or play in the same group of them, but that doesn't mean I don't read up on the cool hip happenings. Well in this case after a loss in Euro 2008 qualifying game, Tomas Rosicky and some of his Czech teammates decided to rent a few whores... err hugging companions for the night, sadly one of them was a reporter.

Arsenal star Tomas Rosicky and five of his Czech Republic team-mates landed the whole squad a £25,000 fine from the Czech FA after spending a night in a hotel with six prostitutes. A female Czech journalist broke the story after she had visited the hotel room herself as an autograph hunter. Players 'drank and hugged prostitutes' while she spoke to Jan Polak at the room door.

Rosicky apologised for his actions at a press conference. He said: 'We have been correctly punished. We are very sorry.' However, he said he had a 'clear conscience' when asked about the presence of the prostitutes.

Nothing says having a banging good time in Prague like a bunch of whores in a hotel room, maybe it was their attempt at slump busting.

2. Ah yes, being a soccer player you would suspect you make lots of money and have an easy time buying home accessories, or so one would think. Well not in the case of Glen Thomson (English Defender) and Ben May (Millwall Striker. Who both decided that the best idea to do would be to go ahead and steal a toilet seat. Now yes I did say a toilet seat, shared between the two of them I suppose (I have no idea what two soccer players would be buying a toilet seat together) but it gets better, they attempted to steal it by placing the toilet seat that was more expensive in a cheaper ones box until a 74 year old security guard caught them. Ah well the security guard is more shifted then two fleet footed soccer players.
Alas may a poor sap one day make a public service announcement that says the following:"Don't steal toilet seats cause you are only going to go in the shitter" Ah yes youth is served!

1. Ah time for the feel good story of the year, the one that puts soccer on top for the clear fact that no where else would this story ever get spilled out into the public for why a player got suspended. Marco Borriello a pretty much unused Striker for AC Milan, got suspended for 6 months because he tested positive for a performing enhancing drug. Now this sounds pretty standard, until you find out why he failed the test. Apparently and according to his wife, Marco used his wife's cortisone cream to get rid of an STD after having sex with her. So yes wife gets infected, uses cream, Marco catches infection, has wife give cream, places cream down there, gets drug tested, tests positive, has wife tell the media what happened. Yup I think this could have gone alot better for poor Marco if he had just shut up and enjoyed the 2 year ban he would have gotten which would have alloted more time for him to bang his supermodel wife. Yes I forgot to state the part where all soccer players get young supermodel wives. Yes Mr. Yashin you can take that up your pipe and smoke it.

I figured a picture of her would suffice as well.

There you have it, the top 10 moments of this year, and it's only almost 1/3 of the way through, I can't wait for the next 2/3. And again, I don't hate hockey I just think there is more passion and more amusement in following soccer and the silly things that they seem to do. On that note, Go Sens Go.

Vote for Rory

2006-12-13T19:32:00.000-05:00

Ah yes, I'm come out of the basement to write a column, you can all start congratulating me right about now... okay kidding, school took over my life the last 3 weeks and any chance of me writing something went down the drain, go figure eh. Ah well the big exam stretch is over, got one left and well some things I need to get off my chest.

Like first off the vote for Rory Fitzpatrick idea, i'll be honest this caught me attention about 3 weeks ago and I haven't been able to really stop voting for the guy. It's all about voting for Rory, you may ask why would you do this, do you really expect a journeyman defensemen to make it, well I do, and it's simply because of the idea that people do indeed make a difference with how they vote. We are always told our vote matters, but in federal politics is never seems to count, as youngster's we become naive with the idea of voting because we know our elders will just pick their ways before our ways matter. This is a chance to show that people can make a difference and you vote matter. The vote for Rory campaign and has caught steam and he is only 100k votes short... I know that seems like a lot but just last week he was 190k votes short, so as you can see he is making progress... *I'll add here that I've voted 150 times for the poor man already*

Anyways it just grabbed my attention today that someone came up with the genius idea to put up attack ads for him. And so without furthur ado i will post them here.

So there's that, please feel free to go to the following hyperlink Vote for Rory, and it will give you instructions on how to vote for him and where to vote for him.

The weird sensation in the chest feeling

2006-11-23T00:47:00.000-05:00

That's what this song bring to me, and maybe to others who knows, and only Holland videos for me.

Just a small quick note, because I had some spare time.

On Notice Edition 1

2006-11-20T13:48:00.000-05:00

Well I found something to play with, so never the less the following are on notice according to me and the godful Stephen Colbert.

That is all for this transmission.

Economy... ain't this a sport blog.

2006-11-18T17:47:00.000-05:00

Milton Friedman, the economist, the last great economist of the 20th century you might be told died the other day, and I know that for most of you this doesn't mean a whole lot, but considering that I'm slowly developing more and more of a taste for economics it has showed me that the day is now for new big economist to pop up and give out new theories or more appealing theories to explain the human nature of wealth and how to fix issues such as poverty and what governments can do to fix these (by the way governments are a burden, they do nothing but attempt to fix chaos in which they add chaos, sorry Anthony it's true, and don't worry NATO is no better in an economist view). Though Friedman worked with alot of politicians and their campaigns and gave advice, he said this was the only view governments could contol:

"The only thing government should do to control the economy was to control the supply of money. Inflation was caused by too much money chasing too few goods. He was an absolutist on this point, holding that inflation was "always and everywhere a monetary phenomenon."

In a way though governments still don't do that, taxes definetly don't help the situation and the fact that governments protect there base rather than allowing free trade it has caused many problems between governments and the economy.

Enough about economy though, it's a sad loss for the community but he did leave a legacy for new economist to follow.

It's all about practice, or not practicing, and well to cheer the mood in the blog I'm leaving you with a bit of a classic pressconference, one that I can watch over and over again, my favourite is his ending comment to it all.

What to do about the Sens

2006-11-14T21:27:00.000-05:00

Well it's been said that life is like a box of chocolate, you never know what your going to get, but I would like to change that, to I'm a box of chocolate, you never know what mood I'm going to be in. Yes you may all agree with me, my moods are more of a swing of sports happiness, to work lonesomeness, but in the end they can revert quickly as the smallest of things.

You may ask what am I making mention to, but i think it's pretty obvious, sports is alot like that as well, when you are feeling the high you are unbeatable, when your feeling low you can't get out of a slump. Sort of what the Senators are feeling right now, and alot like the republician leaders are feeling in the US. The other day on radio I was asked by my cohost what would I do to fix the Sens, would I do the sweeping changes that Ottawa fans are asking for in firing the whole management and starting fresh? My response to that was, no, sadly I don't think this is the time to implode that organization, it doesn't need to be done, it's alot like Dutch soccer where anytime L'Oranje lose the coach is expected to be fired, but instead this time around his contract was extended. But the thing is some tinkering needs to be done, and these were my suggestions.

#1. Get rid of Alfredsson or strip him of the captain, it has come to that time where Alfredsson is not the captain of that team anymore, it's Redden, he's the leader, Alfredsson is getting lost in the locker room, and personally I think it's a fact that some star players won't listen to a guy that was drafted so low, and in the end this team was built around Redden for the next while.
#2. Admit they made a mistake with Gerber and try get rid of him, he can't play in a market where fans are on him all the time, that's why Carolina was good for him, no media pressure, maybe Tampa Bay could use him, he can get some sun, some beach, stuff they don't have in the Alps, and get him away from snow.
#3. Find a second center, to relieve the pressure off the first line, or atleast someone that can win a freaking face off, that would help.

But those are my suggestions rather than imploding a team, but in the end don't panic, I think Sens fans would much rather have a team that starts slow and ends fast with a Stanley Cup, then one that dominates every season and then comes up short.

As for everything else, that should come later in the week, my stomach is growling at me right now, ah well, hope all is well with everyone out there.

Horses.... yes horses

2006-11-01T23:52:00.000-05:00

Yes the topic is horses, those loveable beasts that prance around, and have been used many times to fight wars, hunt things, carry people around, jump over things, and basically have been our bitch for the last 500 years or so, maybe even longer, but then again the camal is a close relative of the horse, so let's just say man uses horses all the time.

Anyways this isn't a heartfelt Barbaro idea, I'm not about to spend the next 3 paragraphs talking about how Barbaro was unfortunate for breaking his leg, he was... but it still amazes me how many people think you can write to a damn horse and he will read it. Maybe that's the thing people believe in what they think can happen and not what reality tells us. Sorry for Barbaro put the only emails you'll get from me are the ones that mock anyone that is writing to you. Giving him a carrot or an apple and tell him to go find a mare and have a good romp in the park.

Moving on from that the story is about a bunch of horses in the Netherlands, that caught my attention today, and the attention of the nation of the Netherlands. Apparently a bunch of horses got trapped after a dyke got flooded over. This left the horses on an island of mud with nowhere to go. So anyways, for the few days not much was done, the hope was the water was too recede. It didn't fast enough and the horses started to starve and die. Which brought the military to come rescue them, they got about 20 of the horses, and couldn't get anymore cause there boats got stuck. So leave it to 4 woman on horses to cross the river and lead all the horses back over a spot that wasn't as deep. Yup that's right apparently the army couldn't think of the idea. Ah well, so the woman saved the day, and now everyone in the netherlands is now worried about the horses and hoping that they eat and make it out all alive. Ah well yes I thought a touching story was needed on this blog every once in a while.

**********
Moving on to some topics that were brought to my attention by one known as AN

1. Why girls smell so nice in the halls. It really makes going to class worthwhile
Girls smell nice so that they can appeal to any blood thirsty male, and to make themselves feel better that other girls don't smell as nice, therefore it's an ugly bloodbath and as Chuck Swarsky would say "She's bleeding profously from the neck area... too much perfume on that one". So yes those that win are the guys who spend there time smelling said girl in hopes to get their number.
2. The rudeness in not answering an e-mail when you know they are expecting a response
Rudeness is not answering an email, but then again it depends who you are talking too, significant other; better reply right away or your dead, friends; you have one day if you are not busy - 3 days if you have a herniated disc because of what you did to someone the night before, coworker; 5 days, take as long as you want, rudeness is expected you work with him, randomstranger; expect the unexpected, don't reply, they might want to take you somewhere.

***********
Sports issues
1. Well Chara scored a goal against the Sens to win the game, doesn't mean I'm about to start cheering for the man... nope I'll cheer when he gets traded in 4 years time
2. Soccer, soccer, soccer, what can I say, I enjoy UEFA Champions League and UEFA Cup, still the most exciting tournament to watch every year, makes league play look like a waste of time to watch... I just need another goalie injury on Chelsea so I can see Terry in net again
3. B-ball season has started, it's great, it makes for a great 6 months, if only they could get rid of the slow play for the last 5 minutes of the game, I hate the commercials then
4. Memo to Isiah Thomas your 1-0, good job, just don't blow leads like Elton John blows.... okay I won't write the rest of the comment
5. I need a new sport to watch, someone mention something, anything, something new and dynamic that I should check out

********

Okay hope everyone is doing well, the final assignment time is starting to show up, hope all our ready for it, good luck and in the end remember that school doesn't really matter, it's about the friends and people you meet that mean the most, something that even i need to remind myself about sometimes.

OUT

If your kid sweats you can get money, wonderful slogan for this new tax rebate

2006-10-26T20:35:00.000-05:00

Ah yes the title, yes it's one that makes me laugh, actually it makes me laugh alot, that society and Canada in general have gone this far to get kids to exercise to reduce the obscene rise in obesity rate that is plaguing Canada and North America for that matter. But yes the study done by a bunch of consultants to figure out how best to give away the 500 dollars a year per family for physical activity was announced today. Or atleast it was announced on how they should go about giving the money away, as alot of arts and culture people are getting angry that sports gets money. I'm sorry to tell you guys that the arts are important, but it's not going to lessen the obesity rate much, I know as much as you hate to hear that, it's the truth and you will have to live with it.

Anyways this is what the panel recommended
"
* The tax credit not be issued unless the activity includes at least one session per week for a minimum of eight weeks.
* For children under 10, eligible activities should include at least 30 minutes of sustained and vigorous activity.
* For those over 10, the time rises to 60 minutes.
* The federal government let parents claim up to $500, but give them an annual maximum of $78.50 per child.
"

What I find really funny about it all is if the kid sweats he should given money, while you could say that eating can make someone sweet and it can be a sustained and vigorous activity if you are in an eating competition. Okay yes maybe I'm going to far there, but I just find it hilarious that the government had to waste a lot of money to figure out how they are going to give 78.50 dollars a year to each kid that does something active. But in the end I guess it's good they are doing some proactive, but really they could do alot better. How about changing rules at schools that don't permit kids to play such sports as dodgeball or tag because kids can get hurt. I'm sorry I don't like seeing kids get hurt, but at the same time more damage is being done to more kids by not letting them do physical activity. Cause we all see the effects now with that wonderful obesity rate and the lack of social skills among kids these days.

Which considering I'm going down this path I should continue, kids should be allowed to explore somewhat, find out who they are by investigating the world, not everything is white and black like the world has now been painted for kids. Again you can make a case that keeping kids entertained inside the house is worse for them with video games. Sure you know they are safe, but how are they supposed to learn how to act other people then their families. There are lots of kids that don't get to explore the world and then when they get to school or even the university life they can't communicate to others, they don't know how to go about, it's just not normal to them. So maybe we should give out money to kids that explore the world as well. Just a thought anyways, probobly a wee bit far fetched, but then again that's why I write this, cause it's my idea and my hope/interest for it to happen.

*Small notes section*
-Les Habs... please trade Sergei back to Boston, we will give you Chara
-Soccer... nothing of interest, except for the nibble event last weekend, Good job Germaine Defoe
-Baseball... world series eh. 4th game on right now... yes I'm riveted to my tv screen right now, oh wait that's a lie
-Hockey... hey after tonight Sens/Leafs series is half over, thank goodness, i don't want to hear the word idiot announced again
-Auto Racing... congrats go out to Mr. Alonso for beating Schumacher, you made my year I'm glad that Kraut didn't win a last championship
-Weather... start snowing already... I want to be blanketed in 30 cm of snow by next week please and thank you

To everyone out there I hope the midterm season is treating you well and all, keep up the good work and until next time. Good night now.

Recovering Addict

2006-10-20T01:08:00.000-05:00

Yes you would wonder about that title, I know I know, it's a confusing state of mind and things, but there are alot of things that can describe a recovering addict, no it's not drugs I'm into, and no I haven't joined the smoking club Andrew (yes I do realize you are trying to quit, but it's my attention to make a silly remark as well), but no i'm trying to recover my sleeping pattern, which sadly doesn't seem to want to recover, and therefore I am an addict to bad sleeping patterns, maybe I'll fix it one day, but for now no such luck. Anyways I'm here to entertain you with a few ideas and to add a wonderful little music video and song that I can't get out of my head right now.

10 things I have to ask about sports this week.

10. Now did we really have to waste 6 games of baseball, that takes about 4 hours each to play, simple just play the 1 game between the Cardinals and Mets and stop having me to watch baseball highlights, no it's fun to play, but it's no compelling to watch unless your in the stadium (and yes I realize I'm going to take grief for that statement, that's why I said it)

9. Will the Dutch stop their disgusting display of cutting veterans and then pretending to invite old veterans back, just pick up Seedorf, move on with your life Van Basten, and fix the god damn midfielder... thank you from all Dutch Soccer Fans (L'Oranje for Life)

8. Fantasy basketball drafts are a way of life, or atleast for me, as sad as that may sound, it's even sadder how much time I spend trying to trade players because it's fun... okay so really I should not look at my team again and study, it's only the freaking preseason.

7. Congrats to the Detroit Tigers, finishing the series in 4 games was alot more compelling to me, you got it freaking done and have a close to 40 year old pitcher with the name of Kenny Rogers anchoring you, how can I now say I'm gambiling for you to win.

6. Memo to the Ottawa Senators... you can't lose all your games before the playoffs, as much as this strategy might finally pay off for you, but you can't you need to get into the playoffs... which I should take note, Boston, congrats on being pathetic, I quite enjoy seeing our defense with the big Chara look like swiss cheese.

5. Wonderful, brilliant, congrats F1, any chance you can cut down the season another 10 races would be greatly appreciated, okay I'm joking about that, while our series expands is nice to see one that contracts and can still make money doing so, go figure, wonder if baseball or hockey, or basketball could think of doing this.

4. To Dynamo Chelski (Chelsea of the EPL), I play keeper, hire me please, won't ask for much money, just want chance to prove myself to Mourinho. And don't worry I wouldn't have any pressure in regards to football... yes look at the video below

3. I would like to congratulate the Philly Flyers for giving Philidelphia something different to talk about in that town then that crap about T.0. where nothing happened. Atleast the Flyers are changing there team and throwing things around, that's more than can be said of what happened at that game a while back... it's okay Bobby you will lose your job soon enough.

2. The Buzzsaw learnt how to blow a lead better than Paris Hilton and Lance Bass combined know how to blow men... yes I went there, but that's only because Matt Leinart and Brian Urlacher have done the deed to ms. Hilton. Which begs the question, what's the over under for Paris per night... is 2.5 men, or 1.75 blow jobs or 0.5 videos... feel free to take me up on any of those odds.

1. Mike Tyson, I pray you fight a kangaroo, just so I can laugh at it later, no I'm not going to pay money to see it, but I'm more than willing to watch it... here's a better suggestion, how about fight OJ Simpson to a death match somewhere in some country that allows these sort of matches... North Korea could be an interesting sight, maybe they can drop the bomb and we can be rid of both... or then again all my entertainment value would be gone.

Anyways I hope that all you recovering addicts have some place to go and someone to take you on... I leave you with the following music video, which is my favourite 80's video I've come across yet.

Basketball draft as it happens

2006-10-12T19:38:00.000-05:00

Well, it's 8:30 at night, and because I feel like it's a good idea to for once blog an opinion on something in the real world, I've went to the fantasy instead. Yes that's right it's the 6th or 7th anunal fantasy b-ball draft... yup I know I sound like a real winner. But it our way of keeping the gang together and having some fun at the same time. So yes that's what will happen. Now to get down to a bit of business, firstly Dustin is the defending champion of this league and has decided to pick at #2. Which is probobly a good choice... hate to decided who to choose at #1. As for those that live with me, Jose is at the 4th spot, myself at #6 and Mike at #10. Now to give anyone a little background, we've been researching for the last week, not that it means anything, just something for us to be entertained with. We also have erected a podium to announce our draft picks, along with a flag, and hopefully some compadres to clap there hands... but maybe not that far. And if we can pull it off we will put some of the video online, but that will be determined later.

So round by round, I will try keep up and either mock or give props, and just try to immortilize anything silly that comes about... from Thunder Bay Ontario, I'm Benny McCarthy reporting live.

Round 1.
Well going into this draft I sort of expect it to go Lebron, Kobe, Marion, KG, Wade... but that's just me... I could be completely wrong, which I've been known to do. Just my thought to start this off. So I've been informed it won't be Lebron... well then I'll just shut up and watch the draft and see how it progresses. Marion goes #1, I like the selection, it's what you wish to do with your team. James, and then KG go... it's all good picks. Jose takes Bryant, no other choice on that one. Brand goes at #5... leaving me with choice but to take Dirk... ah well he can do everything so I can't complain. Then Wade, Arenas, and Nash go next... little early on Nash, all he does is assists in the end, no defensive presence. Allen goes to Mike at #10, followed by Paul, Duncan, Pierce, Bosh... that ends Round 1.

Round 2
Okay so after that entertainment we move on to round 2... home on the range, in reverse order for all. Amare, Dwight and AK47 go in the first 3. McGrady goes next to a fan of Ming... I guess that works, he is a rocket. Mike is up now... I have a feeling AI will go... and I was correct perfectly. Fez takes J O'Neal... no one in this room thought that would be a collect selection. Chuck picks Ming, probobly a very strong selection in the end. Diaw goes next, and I'm up... well after small deliberation I went and picked Richardson, I keep getting him in every draft... maybe I overrate the guy, ah well, it's a solid pick in my mind. Near goes and takes Josh Smith... I think you can overrate a guy, and then you go and draft him in the second round... ah well I guess he blocks your mom after all, or steals her. Well Jose is up... what does he have instore for us... And he picks Jason Kidd... surprised... will get him assists. Carlos takes Carter, I like the pick... Wallace goes next to Dustin. Billups goes last in the round to Jason.

Round 3
Jason is on the board again, got to love how the snake works... he goes and picks Lamar... well done, great pick. Dustin takes Artest, Carlos takes Joe Johnson. Jose is up and he is asking himself what is availble, other than his sister not very much. Well he takes Brad Miller, he needed a stiff pool in the room... or stabiblity, whatever you like to call it. Near is up next. Takes my pick with Carmelo, leaves me no choice but to take Rashard Lewis... didn't want him, but he was there and the best availble. Hinrich, Bibby and Redd go next in a row. Mike is up next... taking his time, doing his scouting I assume, and about to make his selection to the world... he picks Atwain Jamieson... kind of scares me... but he likes the Tarheels... so he selects him (as Jose points out he tarred and feather me). Camby goes next... he's great for an injury or two a season... I like him and all, just wish he could stay healthy for more than 30 games. Rasheed goes next, nothing to say there... yay Wallace I guess. Chris Webber goes next (Mike wonders why... so do I), up next is Cousy... wonder what he will take. Oh wait he takes Iquodala... we all love our 76'ers back to back.

Round 4
Shaq is taking, followed by Davis, and then Wallace, then Jefferson... trying to concentrate don't have as much to say. Mike is up, he takes Okafor... no surprise he has a love for UCONN players. Okur, Peja, Gasol... followed by me picking Marbury, and then the overrated Tyson Chandler. Next up is Jose who will he pick. He picks the bearded European... well done Illgauskas... two quality centers so far. Boozer goes next... for a second there is their anyplace worse than a mormon state for him... no wonder he gets injured all the time... followed by Felton and then Chris Kaman.

Round 5
Mike James gets picked, intriguing. Tony Parker representing team french goes next. Terry goes to Carlos... I like the pick. Jose on the board, MANU... getting his south american fix. Samuel goes next, followed by me picking Maggette. Then Al Harrington, and then Butler and then Ford. Up next is Mike, he picks Howard. Randolph goes next, then Cassell, then Villneuva and then Mohammed.

okay okay, 9 more rounds went by and I refuse to blog about them... mostly because well frankly things got way too insane and I had to actually concentrate on the whole matter and all. So keep in mind everyone that I did put in some effort. Anyways in the end I'll have to try give a post analysis of some sort.

Personally my favourite team at the moment is Jason's... congrats you used the first pick to your full advantage and made some times plicks when it count. After that it's a pick type league, it's all depends on what categories people decide to go for, and who makes the shrewedest acquisitions and pickups throughout the year.

As for my team, I don't mind it, I did what I wanted too, going to make a few moves and watch to see if my team pans out. The three amigos in phase 3 put forth a great effort, and the podium was brilliant.

Hopefully we will put video up soon enough of what we were up to for the first few rounds... but that will take some time, lots of video editing to happen, but it all fairness it was probobly the funniest thing we have ever concieved up here. To all who were at the draft I thank you for being there and hope you enjoyed. You were all very ballsy with your picks.

Regards

Might as well put a big Z on his shirt.

2006-10-06T16:28:00.000-05:00

Okay,

So it was announced some days ago that Zdeno Chara (that loveable big man that the Bruins overpaid to get) will be the captain of the Boston Bruins... *I think my initial reaction to that was... who and what the *A%&@@* .... why.... *

And to be perfectly honest I'm still in that boat with the idea... I just don't get it, did we really have no one else in the Bruins organization that could be the captain, someone that has actually spent enough time with the team to actually understand the team dynamic. It's like telling Chris Pronger, hey welcome to Anaheim... here's the C, now don't go cheat on your wife so that we have to ship you off somewhere (oh wait that wife part already happened allegdealy). Moving along I really can't quite figure out why he was picked as the captain, it stumbs me, i am glad they didn't give it to Bergeron yet, he's too young and the pressure in Boston is too huge to be young and a captain (reminder of the Thorton trade... bah that still angers me). But there were other candidates... 2 that I think really could have been. The first is Glen Muarry, the man has been around hockey long enough to know it all and well, he's been with the bruins alot longer than Chara has been, for goodness sakes. Oh well maybe he's too old to be a captain... well then if we seem to like European captains, why not maybe choose the penalty killing specialist PJ Axelson (by far my fav. choice to have been the next Bruins captain). He's played with the team for years, known how to deal with the personel, and has never been a cancer or anything in the dressing room, he shows with his work ethic, which if you ask me is always a positive way to go about things. But hey, the Bruins choice Chara who will be bumbiling on the blue line all day and get accolades for looking like Hal Gill (by the way not a good thing in my opinion, oh well maybe they will let him play the tough guy role as well, break his hand... be a good fight, Chara vs McGratton, be there)

Enough ranting on Chara, probobly took up more space then he should have, sort of like him in general. Well another video the post... let's just say the Colbert Report is getting up there on my fav. tv show to watch radar... anything to do with an eagle blaming Canada and so forth is a good thing. Or naming things after an eagle works just as well. So enjoy the posted video.

In other news, Holland has 2 friendlies in the next week, ummm let's see if the turmoil of that team continues. Van Bommel gets picked again (why is beyond me) and then refuses to play for the favourtism showing son of a gun Marco Van Basten (yes I said I used to like him, that was until the Portugal match). So Van Bommel won't play, Ruud doesn't trust him yet, and well we are in for an interesting week again. He better win both games... anything less than that and Co Adriense will be coach... mark my words, it's called being a coach in Holland and coaching the national team.

Everyone enjoy your turkey... I'll be heating mine in a microwave... yup you heard that one right, no stove or oven leaves me with the only other route, which is microwavable food... you stay classy Thunder Bay.

Thunked Eagle

2006-09-20T20:35:00.000-05:00

Well greetings all, another wonderful bitterly cool day in the northern part of the province, and thankfully it still smells like fresh air. Yes that's right no pollution baby, no pollution.

Anyways in news, Chuck is home safe and sound, and I'm not talking about sports this post... mostly because my life has been me in bed or me going to class, less time to worry about pity things known as sports... damn you northern sickness damn you... okay so basically I've recovered.

But the meaning of the post is the attached video. I've become quite the fan of the Colbert Report and the Daily Show, and well a few nights ago I just happened to walk downstairs in time for this fantastic report of Stephen's Eagle... and well I can't stop watching it without laughing everytime. So I hope you all enjoy.

Chuck Thunked

2006-09-15T21:43:00.000-05:00

Greetings all,

Well I want to congratulate Chuck for being the first male visitor to come up and visit me in Thunder Bay. Yes he now has that distinction, probobly for the better for him, the man last time I checked was looking for more back pills than leave it to beaver reruns... it's what happens when you travel, you get stiff body parts, sadly he is learning the lesson the hardway.

Sort of like Mr. Constantine, who sadly got suspended for one of the most creative ideas ever in terms of punishment. In hockey when you suck, and it can happen, usually the coach will make you do sucides for half an hour or so after the game, well apparently Mr. Constantine went to the university of creativity and tweaked it a bit... instead of any type of physical punishment, he went for the mental punishment. Instead of exerting oneself after a game even more he feed them dinner, instead of wasting lots of time and getting less sleep, therefore worst recovery, he drove them home right away. So you may ask, what's wrong with this picture, well it's simple, during that whole time they had to wear there hockey equipment. Yes hockey equipment stinks, and yes it's probobly slightly unsanitary to be eating food in your equipment (wonder if they went to an upscale restaurant, or maybe a Chucky Cheese, the guys could have played video games, or played in the ball pit, think of the fun it would be to play in the ball pit with hockey equipment on, diving at each other and all). But the point is, he was creative and I salute him, atleast he thought of something different, now if only we could get governments to think like that rather than the same old same old.

Anyways onto furthur business at hand, hockey starts, and sadly I don't care yet. The Tigers have almost blown up and giving up there lead, until they decided to come out and pull a Barcelona and win 17-2. But then again they might have just blown all there runs for the next year.

UEFA has started up it's round robin play in champions league, not much to report other than the fact that Real Madrid, is Real Madrid, lack of defense. Man U needs to teach Saha how to jump, apparently he doesn't know how too at all... poor guy, must be his unatheletic french ability.

Anyways just a quick update... cause Constantine is a wonder.

Watch out for Chuck, he'll be different after T-Bay

Ron Mexico Appreciation Day

2006-09-09T12:15:00.000-05:00

Yes, that's right, an appreciation day is a well deserved day for Ron Mexico. And me and the guys couldn't think of a better day to do it then today. We have designated it as Ron Mexico Appreciation Day. For those of you who don't know Ron Mexico, I'll have to fill you in, firstly the name is an alias that was used by Micheal Vick and NFL Quarterback for the Atlanta Flacons. Who allegedly used the alias down in Mexico while he was on vacation. Sadly during the visit, he ended up giving some poor girl herpes, and apparently forgot to tell her before hand that this had happened. Hence the legend of Ron Mexico.

So in appreciation of his efforts, a party has been born. A party that will include the following, tequilla (as the mexican drink of choice), mexican food (hot and spicy), and friends (minus hopefully any idea of herpes being transmitted to anyone)... yes we don't condone herpes transmission. Also there will be no Ron Mexico Jr. antics allowed either, no guns, no robbing 15 year kids, and no stomping on people's legs trying to break them. Just good clean celebrating times.

So as the Mexican's would say

OLE

Thunked in T-Bay

2006-09-06T20:08:00.000-05:00

That's Thunked,

Okay so the catch phrase hasn't caught on yet, no worries not even in my mind yet either, maybe it's a matter of time, or maybe I should just go with the classy Run you fucking dinosaur run phrase... or then again another kick at the can does just well enough.

Speaking of another kick at the can, Marco Van Basten is lucky that he gets to continue to coach the Dutch soccer team. Rumour had it, Co Adrienese, a Dutch coach that coaches the club team FC Porto was waiting on the wings if the Dutch had squeked out another 1-0 affair in there Euro 2008 qualifications. Thankfully for Van Basten and FC Porto a coaching change won't happen so soon... mind you I would have liked to see FC Porto try find another coach.

Well the US Open is getting to the grand finale, the big match up of Nadal and Federer is still on track. But no matter who wins this open it will forever be known as Agassi's swan song, and I have to say I enjoyed every minute he was on the court. He played with heart and determination, and with 23000 noisy New Yorkers behind him you would have thought you were at a soccer match. So thanks Agassi for the memories, I know my favourite will always be the time you got angry at your opponent at the US Open and decided to lob every ball he hit at you... as much as you didn't win every point it was just so funny to watch, oh and before I forget pretending to not throw the ball properly was funny as well.

Okay the pink taco, which probobly has gotten my favourite possible name for a football stadium, and leave it to my new fav. team, the Arizona Buzzsaw errr Cardinals. You'll be seeing me get my Leinart Hilton jersey shortly, or the every so popular Leinart's baby jersey, thank you USC basketball player for getting knocked up. Now if only Fred Smoot would come to the Buzzsaw that team would be complete.

In other news, I'm back in Thunder Bay, getting my life organized and setting myself up for an interesting year of classes, I'll update you more on that later, once I figure what I'm doing with my life... which sadly at this point I have no idea again. But never fear I'm signed up for a bunch of classes and we will see where the world takes me.

Back on the air hopefully this Sunday from 8 to 10pm on www.luradio.ca, I'll let you know if anything should change.

Take care all
Hup Holland Hup

Charging

2006-08-15T15:29:00.000-05:00

Greetings,

This is the briefest of messages, just had to post the video though, couldn't help myself considering I always remember it. In the following video it will show you the proper way to charge the mound, which is you need to make sure no one can tackle you from behind. So without furthur ado, for all you baseball brawlers, who just need to get out from beside the plate and hit that dirt hill so that you can take a lousy swing at the pitcher and probobly miss. Let's face it, baseball players can't fight.

Thunked Notes 1.2

2006-08-12T13:15:00.000-05:00

Just a quickie here, and no not the kind of quickie anyone is thinking about, yes I know you all thought it was an ESPN report... sorry my mind didn't go that far down the gutter like some would have hoped it would have with that word.

Firstly, off to Kingston to enjoy to solitude of a house, maybe i'll have internet connection, than again maybe not. Either or shall be an interesting night, as per the norm I'm a slave for going down with friends. I really got to stop writing everything can take on a sexual meaning today.

In other news I'm glad tight pants boy, errr Nadal lost in tennis, made me worry less about the spanish people, I would have felt better though if someone had mixed in a Portugal's Spain comment in the broadcast, or Canada's Oregon, or something along those lines, maybe even a Ottawa's Kingston... yes that's right the queen picked us, get over the fact that you didn't become the big town Kingston... just enjoy the king in your name, you swine.

Football is coming up, and every Bengal's player is trying to make the team by getting put in jail for the best reason, but never fear until Maurice Clarrett makes the team anyone has a chance to win.

Baseball, it's baseball I continue to forget about it. Now off again I go to lalaland to enjoy a little trip.

Regards

Thunked Notes 1.1

2006-08-10T00:02:00.000-05:00

Plain and simple, sometimes I come out with random words to use as a catch phrase, other times I just am plain stupid and come up with a term that really probobly won't work or catch on at all, but well it just sounds funny. So here comes the thunked notes version. My new way of spurting off random ideas on different subjects, so that it comes and hits you straight in the noggin.

Firstly because I am not French it is time for me to way in on that wonderful contreversy known as the tour the france, plain and simple Floyd Landis cheated, and did a hell of a job doing it. But I'm not going to say he should be disqualified, actually in fact I'm going to applaud the man, I congratulate him for trying to cheat, but shame on him for getting caught. Let's be honest if we really wanted to make sports easier we should just let everyone cheat. This way we don't have to worry about every athlete cheating, as it will be the ones that can cheat the best will win. Yes this could have an impact on the younger generations, yes the health affects are negative, but if you are that driven to win for short term glory and an early passing, well it's your choice, go for it. So realistically, I wish Dick Pound would shut up for once, that more people would cheat and get caught, and that everyone would give up on how bad steroids are for you, if you want to fix something, how about you start with banning fast food, that will have more of an impact on health than that of steroids.

Reminder to the Iberian Penisula, when fighting forest fires, make sure to use enough water to stop a blaze, if blaze is 20 feet high, make sure to have an escape plan, and a car that can go faster than the wind is blowing the flames. Just some helpful knowledge to all those brothers fighting fires in Portugal (I gurantee you some arson set them because Portugal lost)

Harry Sinden, aka the bastard who hasn't won a cup for the Bruins in 30 years. Okay so I like the man somewhat, he hasn't been that bad, just in the last 5 to 10 years I've come to question some of his moves, I think the mind just started to go blank there. But then again he did bring us Neely for nothing, and well we did win a couple of stanley cups with him around. I just think it was time for him to move on, and you can tell he didn't want to, but it was either resign, or get fired, and well resigning just looks so much better in the public eye. So thanks for the service Harry, but also thank goodness you are gone. Next up a new owner for the Bruins, instead of the Fire Millen campaign I now direct you to the Fire Jacobs campaign.

On a side note of the last comment, will the Bruins be giving out bobbleheads of Jeremy Jacobs on opening night to create a riot. Sort of like the stanley cup did last year, when 50% of them ended up on the ice to end the game. Just a strategic move Jacobs to see your popularity.

Next up, what does Heather Mills (formely McCartney) and Ben Roethlisberger have in common... simple they have both been in accidents involving motorcycles. Ben messed up his grill and probobly the Steelers chances to repeat this year and Heather lost a leg. Now they do have differences, Ben was the moron riding the motorcycle, and Heather was the moron who didn't hear the siren on the police motorcycle that hit her. Really I just had to put that out there so you could all see that my mind works in different ways, not always the proper way.

Now to baseball for a quick second.... Blue Jays are sucking.

Moving on from baseball, told you it was a quick second.

Soccer also known a football, time for the leagues to start up shortly, and time for me to get on PSV jersey and hope for a good year of glory, hell I'll cheer on any dutch team in the Champions league, and pray that Juventus continues to suck for 3 years after that cheating scandal... again cheating is only good when you don't get caught.

That's all for today's version on thunked, I would like to thank all those who read the coloumn, the more you post the more it inspires me to write.

Regards

P.S. Jose I know you are going off to fight forest fires in Portugal, make sure to save the farm, and grab some roast beef... and yes I'm still expecting you to call soon.

Zidane headbutt an art form?

2006-08-01T15:51:00.000-05:00

Greetings my always happy to hear from me friends.

Well after a hiatus on a 2 day camping trip, which I might add was quite relaxing, let me tell you, the whole no moving thing and lying in a hammock all day long reading a book was probobly the most needed thing ever... I may buy a hammock and put in in my backyard, and just swing from it all day long, or atleast that's what I would like to do.

But enough about my life, i'll post a couple of camping pictures and move on with my life back to the sporting world... well this time the art world. By now everyone has seen the Zidane headbutt, it has become more popular that the song who let the dogs out was 4 years ago. *Yes I still replay the headbutt, it cracks me up*. But now it has become an art form, a musical art form. So without furthur ado, I have to lead you to the song that was made just for Zidane's headbut. It's called coup de boule and was writing by three associates of La Plage Records, a small label specializing in jingles and sound effects. Coup de Boule, in french means head butt in english, just to make sure you all get your daily dose of translations provided by myself. But yes it's quite a catch reggae inspired tune. I know I'll probobly play it over and over again for the next week or so. But without furthur ado. Here it is, in all it's glory.

Dissapeared, never a good thing

2006-07-22T12:31:00.000-05:00

Greetings fellow blog mates,

So yes I dissapeared for quite a while, okay clearly I blame the world cup and my team being out and not allowing me to gloat, but it's a silly excuse, and well won't be used anymore. So why wasn't I around, maybe because my creative writing took a nose dive faster than the New York Islanders chances of winning the stanley cup anytime soon... seriously Garth Snow... you got to be freaking kidding me, but they aren't, and in the end I blame Mad Mike for somehow messing up the Islanders some more. Reminder goalies don't make good GM's, they take way too many shots to the head.

Anyways, i myself am getting my quota of sun each day, probobly over the quota and will get skin cancer in a few years and hate the fact I was a lifeguard... maybe I should add the fact I'll probobly get cataracts and just about any other sun problem one can have, then again maybe not, and that's all for the better. Yes i do wear my sunscreen each day, but when one is in the sun for 5 hours with no stoppage to hit the shade and hide from the sun, one is going to take in alot of wonderful UV rays.
Ah well atleast I have the wonderful racoon eyes.

I would also like to comment that John Slamons is a gigantic moron, firstly for not wanting to go to the Suns and enjoy the run and gun offense, and then not wanting to go to Phoenix North aka Raptors and playing the same sort of game. Could someone tell me what he wishes to do as he has no contract as of right now and well no one is going to offer him any big money, or maybe money doesn't matter and family matters, I'm sure it does Mr. James, errr wait you didn't end up in Houston like you wanted too, hmmmm so it sure isn't family. But yes athletes, espeically in the NBA make me laugh, they think they can ask where to go, and think that team will accept them, sure some of the star players could get away with this, but when your names are Mike James and John Salmons you should just be freaking happy you still have an NBA contract and a wealthy one at that for your play. But then again, what do I know about the culture of the NBA, probobly nothing, only read a book on it, and did my own studying for classes. So alas I'll just shut up before I dig myself a whole I won't get out of.

Reminder to F1, as much as I love watching it, you guys still suck, and haven't been able to change it for 10 plus years, ever since Senna's death has that sport gone nowhere, you ask why, well it's pretty simple, firstly the cars still don't pass each other very often, which I hate to say makes the sport, you have made pitstops mostly ineffective as everyone can do it, you have also cut any dynamic out of the races but the obscene budget some teams are on. Put a budget on how much teams are allowed to research, you are killing the sport, you need more teams to compete so that more people will watch and rather than kill your sport you can grow it. Sure you went into the Asian and Middle East market, but that's not growing your sport in the core market, which is Europe.

Anyways that was a quick post, more on everything shortly... I really really really promise.

Hup Holland

How to soccer commentate

2006-06-27T23:15:00.000-05:00

Just a quick note for the ESPN coverage of how to commentate a soccer game, remember you need to show a bit of passion, and also you need to yell and scream, instead of being some stiff in a suit who has no idea what they are talking about, that's right I'm looking at you Balboa. And for entertainment purposes if you can mix in a you're with me leather comment then I will never make fun of you ever again. Now in case you didn't know how to do that, watch the following video from 1998, and listen to the passion.

Remembering Hoffa as a Raptor

2006-06-27T19:13:00.000-05:00

Well I didn't go after this right away when it happened, I apologize the world cup came ahead of making fun of Rafael Araujo. But alas, the former BYU stiff is off to Utah, perfect for his mormon like tendencies and his ability to play below the rim. The question that needs to be asked though is will AK47's wife use her free sleep card with the brazalian mormon stiff who knows already had to go through the ladies.

Just so we don't forget, here is his best moment of the last 2 years with the Raptors and when I mean best, showed his talent as best he could. Actual talent is a whole different question, and so is heart. Ah well good luck Hoffa plenty of mormons in Salt Lake City for you.

Regards

Real Rap in my view

2006-06-27T18:19:00.000-05:00

Well I feel like I should culture people in this blog, and when I mean culture I mean culture them about Netherlands and about music and the industry as a whole today. I have left the following video for you to watch with the words posted in english for you to understand. Enjoy it and read my thoughts on it after.

I'm from the country of Pim Fortuin and Volkert van der G.
The country of Theo van Gogh and Mohammed B.
Am from the country of croquettes, frikadellen
Which you can order all the way until the Spanish coast
From the country where index never goes out of fashion
Where they'll crack you up the moment you will make it large
Am from the country of red white blue and the golden lion
Plundered the world and called it the Golden Age
Am from the country of weedplantations and bicycleraces
The country you can ask a junkie for a bike
The country that became euro champion in 88
The country of biting herring, dikes and canals
Am from the country of, the country of tall Fransie
This is the country I come home to after my vacation

Am from the country where I was born in 1982,
Where I lost the guilders to the euro
The country that participates in the war on Iraq
Cause uncle Bush has Balkenende in his bag
The country where miserly is common no doubt
Cause Baas B is still from Diemen South
The country of riots between Ajax and Feyenoord
But when Orange plays everyone will gather
The country of Johan Cruijf and Aben Lenstra
The legion never lets the lion down
The country where we hope the weather will improve every day
No one trusts the weather guy anyway
The country that has been free since 45
The country where I'll stay forever
Honoustly
I love it

I'm from the country you can drive through in less than three hours
With a different dialect every ten minutes
Am from the country where theoretically there's room for everyone
And where XTC is export product number 1
Am from the country where Andre Hazes will always rule in every bar
Where Peter Gert-Jan Raymond Frans Bart and Ali run the game
Am from the country where hip-hop is a 30 year old kid
You find out how cool that is
The country where prostitution and dope smoking is allowed
The country of Sinterklaas and Queensday
This is the country I was lost and betrayed
This is the country I was born and raised

I'm from the country with the highest cultural diversity per sq. meter
But where one is too afraid to have dinner with his own neighbour
And integration is a beautiful word
But shit, it's fuckin bitter when it is never heard
I share my country with Turks & Marrocans, Antillians, Moluccan & Surinames
The country where we hold to many thoughts back
Worldwide represented by Harry Potter
A country where Apartheid, internationally
is the best known word from the Dutch language actually
Am from the country that ticks like a bomb
The country that has dinner at 6 and is always on time
This is the country where I'll win in the end
Untill you sing along in the ArenA subways
And till that time I've lost my heart
This is for Holland, Baas B, Lange Frans

That's the song, and if you watched the crowd, the silence in the crowd is wonderful, it was played in Nederlands and well young and old understood it and to me that's what makes this rap wonderful. It cultures others of a real life problem, makes you think, hence why I've never liked some North American rap, I find that it's not telling a story but rather trying to make a quick buck about being shot 50 times, or berating other singers. Sure it's all fun and games for some, but when every rap song has little meaning other than picking up a girl at a club, losing a girl, or telling some story about how his or her life was so tough, then really it's not worth my time to listen. For the most part that's what I perceive as North American rap, in the end their is no story only a bunch of random thoughts, with a thuggery beat that gets everyone thinking that being the big bad tough thug isn't so bad after all. What does this bring, it brings out the thought that everyone can be a thug and dress with the bling, steal things, get shot at and life will be good. But to me that's not what rap was supposed to be about. Back in the early 90's is when the real North American rap was around, telling stories about the difficulties of being black, the struggles of a North American society and so forth, and to me that's the kind of rap that should be heard which it isn't anymore. Anyways hopefully you all reflect on this, feel free to post your thoughts, for or against, it's more of a debatable topic for everyone.

Regards

Well the Dutch are out

2006-06-25T18:38:00.000-05:00

The recovery process begins now for myself... I have to say i'm still digesting the game and it still stings in a few ways. I have to say I'm ashamed with the reaction of some Dutch fans on the world cup blog that I frequent, but at the same time and ashamed of the squad itself and also Portugal's team and fans. Basically it's one big mess nowadays, and I have to wonder if there would be a riot by the end of the night between the fans, as clearly the players didn't seem to mind going ahead and trying their luck in a hockey rink. I will apologize in advance as I'm just writing out my feelings and that I may jump around from time to time, i'll try my best to keep this in context, but rather than people asking me later what I thought, they can read the blog and understand where I'm coming from.

So I will rewind all away back to December when the pools were put together, Jose (my portuguese roommate) and I were watching the the little 10 inch tv that we have at school and watching the draw come out. We watched, and I predicted the group that the Dutch got and 2 our of the 3 freaking opponents we got drawn with. But anyways that's nowhere with where this story is going, it's more in the sense of when we first looked at it we knew that we would sadly probobly play in the round of 16. Firstly because we were probobly going to finish behind Argentina, and well Portugal was probobly going to end first due to the easy group they got. Anyways so back in that day I knew this day would come.

Rewind to the start of the world cup, I may not have said it, but their were 2 teams I didn't wish the Dutch to meet, firstly the Brazilians (we seem to screw up alot in the last 30 years against them) and Portugal (1-6 record doesn't look good on us... make it 1-7 now). You may ask what do these 2 teams have in common, well firstly both are coached by Brazilians, but that's not the real reason, the real reason is that they play our game, the Dutch game, offensive soccer, and they play it as good if not better than us at times. No other nations play soccer like these 3 nations do, and that's what is the big difference, we can't seem to match up well against teams that play our game, maybe it's cause we are so used to a defensive team that we forget about the offensive punishment those teams can put on us, their creativity and the fact they want the ball.

Fastforward to 5 days ago
I've been a wreck since that matchup reared it's ugly head, cause I knew it was going to happen and that their was nothing I could do about it. I've been told by people I'm not a real Dutch fan when I say we are going to lose to Portugal, it was a gut feeling, and a feeling of hating to play that opponent, sure I guess maybe I shouldn't have been so pessismistic, but alas it's how I felt and I thought I would state my opinion. I guess it was my attempt to be a realist of a fan and not just someone who pretends that their is nothing wrong at all and that everything is going well, when clearly it's not.

Game day
Like every game day this world cup, I've been dressed it my orange hat, orange 2000 to 2002 version Dutch jersey and I sat downstairs on the couch watching the game, maybe it was the fact I was alone this time, maybe I should have told people to come over, but i didn't, I was set to watch the game in agony by myself. My family left me alone, didn't even bother to come down, probobly for the better at points as clearly I wasn't in the mood to socialize.

Start of the game,
Well it was announced, the starting lineup, for some reason we have to start Sneijder and Van Bommel, yes I really dislike seeing both of those guys on the field at the same time, they fire shot after shot on net all the time, most times it's blocked, but they sure love to blast it rather than setting up plays in the midfield. The bigger news was the like of Ruud, while I was fine with it early on, I was expecting him to come in by the 60th minute if something was needed to be done... like score a freaking goal. So I was a tad nervous.

1st half,
Well first 10 minutes, Dutch has some good possesion, but we didn't infact use it at all, it was more of a let's play with the ball a bit, some chances were always one pass short, or one stupid shot long, or the fact that we could organize ourselves between the forwards and midfielders, it's been a problem all tournament, that last touch of the ball (quick pass to the forward), that never seemed to work at all, maybe it's the young and inexperience of the team still, but it just never seemed to click in the end. Then Portugal took charge a bit, found some room and Maniche scored an excellent goal, very nicely played with Pauleta and they deserved that goal, I have no problem admitting the Dutch defense broke down, and couldn't close the gap in time. Van Der Saar had no chance on it either. So 1-0 Portugal, they keep the play a bit for the next 10 minutes, finally the Dutch seemed to have woken up, or got rid of those nervous butterflies and start to take some control of the game, a few chances, some very nice work by Van Persie on the wing, if only he could finish the shot (maybe this is why Arsenal doesn't use him more). And a red card. Might I add the other like 3 yellow cards in the first half, mind you that didn't seem to matter much, cause it only got worse later.

2nd half
Well probobly the strangiest half of this year's world cup, and probobly will become well known as the game that just lost all marbles. 3 more red cards giving out, a brawl, another 9 yellow cards, Scolari yelling at Basten, lots of diving, pushing, shoving and really a whole lot of crappy none soccer play. A few chances, Cocu off the post (the old guard hitting the post... sigh sounds so familiar, and it wasn't a shootout), a few close changes and some 9 on 9 action. In the end Portugal won.

Marco Van Basten:
I still like him as a coach, as for the most part the Dutch team was kept together this tournament, but he did get out coached this game in a way, and he also tried to put his stamp on the team. He went for youth this tournament, I supported the idea, cause he brought a few veterans, but I did not enjoy the fact that he didn't play Ruud and instead put on VofH on to try score a goal, we never had a high ball to go after firstly, secondly our corner kicks sucked so much that it didn't matter how tall our big forward was, it wasn't going to do much. Sadly Ruud should have been on for Kujt, and he might have scored that goal that Kujt couldn't flick over the goalie. I like Kujt, he puts in a big effort all over the field, but the man can't score, he hasn't been a finisher really at all for the amount of chances he gets, it's a developing talent I guess, but Ruud would have been more effective in this flowing game with less players on, he needs space and he would have gotten it. As well Robben was getting double teamed all game because Ruud wasn't around and Portugal could focus on him, hence the fact that he was rather ineffective most of the game until it opened up with the circus show. In the end Van Basten got out coached, or out manuvered even himself, but I still think he should continue to lead this team until 2010, the players respect him, and he's coaching isn't that bad, give him time, he's learning as well and will grow up with these guys, and hopefully in 4 years we will be back and more ready and less nervous with the experience they will have gained.

The game itself
Diving, a Portuguese and Dutch tradition. Yes that's right a tradition, it's nothing new, and sadly I expected it, the problem was the Russian ref bought into most of it and threw out cards with more reckless abandoment then Shawn Kemp in a bedroom. Sadly he got suckered by the dirty tactics of both teams, and well they both kept playing like that because of it. If he had called a few diving calls that would have ended that game and it could have opened up, or closed up into an actual game of soccer.
The Dutch played with nerves for a good portion of the game, and you can't win games when you can't string that last pass together. I don't agree with people when they say the Dutch have no talent, as we saw it when players went one on one with others, but it was the last 1/3 of the pitch where we couldn't make that perfect pass to spring the forward, or for that matter pick out the right player coming down, everyone had tunnel vision sadly.

For now I wish Portugal well against england, I know the rivalry between them and the Dutch is only now just beginning, and will continue to grow, sort of becoming our Czech problem, just going to have to get over it. I hope they can manage without Deco and Miguel, and maybe Figo, but only time will tell, atleast beat up on England, cause really in the end no one likes them. For now I will hide away and ponder some more about the game and the future of the Dutch squad still hopefully looks bright.

Hup Holland

Bring on the West Iberian

2006-06-21T16:17:00.000-05:00

Ah yes,

Quietness on my front, it's a patient quietness, I didn't want to cause the wrath of the gods to strike down on me. So it hasn't yet, somehow the Dutch made it quietly through the round robin, not stepping on too many toes and therefore not causing me to become over confident nor over nervous. Usually it's the latter of the two I have problems with as they love to not make it easy on themselves. But here we are, moving onwards, and yes this is why I have stayed quiet. I haven't wanted to put my foot in my mouth, and probobly should just stop talking now, but got to move on, the round of 16 is upon us.

So after a round of 2: 1 goal games and a 0-0 tie, I have to say i'm pleased. You may ask why, but it's simple, we have had tough games so far, no easy games and slowly but surely we are building ourselves up. So why the nervousness with Portugal. I'll be honest I don't want to play them for a couple of reasons. I believe they are a quality team, and I don't want to lose due to bragging rights with the one they call the slave trader.... yeah you know who he is.

Anyways i'll be pushing the dutch bandwagon is obvious nervousness and I'll be ready for the game this coming Sunday. It should be another classic battle between the 2 teams... just hope my team prevails. More to follow shortly enough.

Hup Holland

2006-06-12T15:19:00.000-05:00

Hup Holland indeed,

I've giving myself a day to celebrate, me and the Grolsch bottle, alot like Kyle Orton and the Jack Daniel bottle. But I didn't go that heavy on the celebrations, while I'm very happy with the vicotry, 3 points is 3 points, I do realize that it's still 6 games to go to win the world cup and to me that is the ultimate goal, so rather party slowly and get bigger and bigger as it goes along. So if we do happen to win in July 9th, I'll have to have a kegger, some strippers and a room painted orange... hmmm on second thought that could be a financial issue at the end of the tournament. "Sir why do you need a bank loan?" ummmm because I pissed all my money away after the Nederlands won the world cup.... yes that's clearly going to work well for me.

But we must move onwards, after a slow and unpacy match with the S&M crew, we now get to move on those Ivorians and the stamina and quickness that they have. I watched the game against Argentina, and one thing is for sure you can't sit back on them, not that I expect the Dutch too, as they have always liked to own the ball and move it around on there own pace, but we will have to make quicker and better quality passes in the attacking third if we wish to win the game outright. With saying that though, I think the Dutch are better prepared to play an Ivory Coast squad then an S&M crew. Our 3 friendlies before were against Cameroon, Mexico and Australia. Two out of the 3 teams play a more open style, an attacking football style, which should allow more room for Mr. Horseface (Ruud) to create in the middle of the attacking 1/3. Robben looked disgusting this weekend, always was a quick bugger, as long as he and Van Persie stay unangry towards each other. Which I'm sure Van Basten has already fixed. Clearly Van Persie was angry, but the problem was Robben was on his game, and the Dutch ran with it that way, I don't expect that to happen again, as Van Persie had great flashes of brilliance as well when he did get the ball.

As for the midfield, well Cocu was there, but not really there, not the crisp passes I'm used to seen from the old veteran, and Sneidjer just scared me every free kick he took went not at all where it was supposed too, maybe it was nerves, maybe the injury or maybe the heat, but he really didn't overly impressed me with the amount of touches he had with the ball. Hopefully the Dutch squad will continue to get healthier and we will see the likes of Van der Vaart back to lead the midfield attack. The defense held up well for the most part, I do rather like seeing Boularhouz in the middle, but that's just my personal preference. All in all yesterday was a great start to the campaign, and uncharacteristic start for the Dutch, and hopefully we can just improve on the situation on Friday. Just watch out for Drogba, but I'm sure Robben has tips on him.

Hup Holland

Marco van Basten Top 15 Quotes

2006-06-08T23:01:00.000-05:00

Yes Marco van Basten is a man who's not afraid to say what's on his mind for the most part, and indeed I like the fact he tells it like it is, so here is his top 15 quotes in my opinion, that I could read in english so far, if you have anymore you like post them as a comment, and if I like it enough I'll add it into my list.

1. 'As long as it is an open talk and you are not out to win the discourse, everyone involved can only gain from it. Neither Cruyff or I invented the game so none of us is right per se. Although, when it sunk in after a while, I usually had to agree that he was right after all. I still love those talks, but there are few players now with a clear opinion so it does not happen very often. That is a pity.'

2. “I'm satisfied with the result, but not with the way we played,” On just about every game that they win.

3. "It was like an episode of Mash in the dressing room." After the game against the Aussies where 3 Dutch players left with injuries

4. “Oranje is a fleurige mixture of freedom and blijheid, fanaticism, game joy and youthful zest, with sausje pure class transvased.” On his thoughts on what being a Dutch National team player is all about

5. 'We've abandoned the petty fines for coming late or leaving mobiles on, as this is not the kind of money that will hurt any modern player. As a punishment he now has to tell a joke in front of the group. That works very well. No one has sinned so far.' His way of fining players

6.'Many sides in the competition have an advantage compared to us due to their experience of playing in major competitions,' he says. 'We have other qualities, but this is a tough challenge for us.' His attempt at making it look like the Dutch are the underdogs and have something to proof, rather than being known as the favourite.

7.'Big names mean nothing to me, I am only interested in good players. I do think other midfielders have shown they can do better in the national team than Seedorf. A player like Van der Vaart can be a stylish playmaker, but also does his fair share of work for the team and that is exactly what we are looking for.' On his reason why he didn't choose Seedorf, Maakay and Davids

8.I've said to him a couple of times, "Do you enjoy it, Alex? Daddy won't make you play football." After I said it the first time, he did his best especially. But football means nothing to him. He doesn't support a club, either. It really doesn't bother me. It's just good for him to move a little, to play sport. But he likes K'nex much more - the toys you have to put together. His grandpa, Liesbeth's father, is handy, too. He must have got it from him. Alex can put together a K'nex fairground in an hour. And yesterday he was doing a puzzle.' Marco softer side and that he isn't trying to push his son and has come to accept it that he won't be a star soccer player.

9.“We train always on the knife edge with a lot of emotion, but I explained to Ruud that it is important that we control our emotions and treat team mates with respect.” Making everyone realize that it's all ofr the team.

10. 'I hardly believe that is the case. As coaches John van't Schip and I try to behave as equals with the players. We don't shout across the training ground to get everyone's attention. The players look at me like I am just a trainer and not some legend from the past. If they ever had my posters on their bedroom wall, I don't think they are still hung up there. I go to the bathroom just as they do.' How he is an equal and the team all has the same respect level, even though he is the coach doesn't mean at all that he is better than them.

11. Every country has been given a slogan and the orange bus used to transport the Dutch players at the tournament is adorned with the line: 'Orange on the way to gold'.

"We don't like it because we try to keep everything calm and this might be seen as a provocation" Van Basten told reporters on Wednesday.

12."Players can get in real good form, while others fall through the ice" How much ice there'll be in a German summer remains to be seen, but we're pretty sure some of the Dutch squad will give their team-mates the cold shoulder.

13."Klaas-Jan had a good season at Ajax and Heerenveen with many goals but is unlucky that we won't take four central strikers to the World Cup," On his reasoning for not picking Huntleer, just one two many central strikers.

14. “This staff intends to build a team which is offensive and attractive where the players must show proof of initiative and especially take pleasure in putting on the orange jersey.”

15. “They're all countries with a rich history and technically skilled players. We're going to make sure that we're well motivated from the start. If you start out with a tough one you immediately know what you are worth.”

U bent met me, Leer

2006-06-08T21:07:00.000-05:00

Yes your with me leather indeed. Have to keep up with the tradition at deadspin.com on that one and thank them for that reference. If you ask me, it has alot to do with soccer in a way anyways. The ball, used to be made of leather back in the day, and if you called it leather now, people in the world would still understand the concept quite well. As is said with the world cup now so close and the Dutch getting ready for there game on Sunday, I will now have another look at the probable starting lineup and add some notes on each of the players, my thoughts of where they are at, and how they will do this world cup coming up.

Hup Holland

Starting Lineup:

Goalie
Edwin van der Sar:Okay so the Lions are going to live and die through their goalie this campaign. His experience and veteran leadership is what's going to keep our back line together and organized so that we can show a tough defensive fight. It's his last chance probobly to catch glory in a world cup and I'm pretty sure he plans to make his last stand. In Euro 2004 we saw a very good performance and expect much the same and if not a little better as his time at Man U has just improved him.

Defense (4)
Giovanni van Bronckhorst: Also known as Gio, will be playing the left side most likely, and floating around like he is known to do in Barcelona, expect to see him coming down the left side to help out the offense, can play his defensive position pretty well, but is more known for his offensive flair, sort of like a Cafu in Brazilian circles, just not as old yet.

Wesley Sneijder: Hoping that he can get back from his ankle injury in time, Sneijder while known as a midfielder can play the back line well. Adds a bit of experience to the back 4 and some height, which is a problem against some of the bigger teams in the group. A well rounded player who can move the ball quickly up the pitch.

Jan Kromkamp: While looking like a stiff against Aussies it shall give him something to prove during the opening round as long as Van Basten does indeed give him his spot back, which i don't see why not, you didn't bring Opdam up, which in my mind was maybe his biggest mistake, but then again we all need to believe in Marco and hence forth I will do so.

Khalid Boulahrouz: Solid Right Back, a stay at home defender that takes care of business. Won't let many of the winger's through and is quick enough to stay with them. Expect people to attack down the middle rather than worry about facing Boulahrouz.

Midfield (3)
Mark van Bommel: While he has been less then impressive lately, van Bommel can indeed play soccer, still getting over a slight injury Van Bommel can move the ball very well, and can run with the team, as long as he plays with the team. For now expect him to be playing the right side and getting the ball up to the wingers.

Phillip Cocu: The god of the Dutch team, Cocu is about as veteran as you get and is in charge of this team, can organize the offense and defense extremely well. Great passer and great vision of the field. May be the most underrated star Dutch player of all time, never gets enough credit, but can move to any part of the field that he is placed and be a star. This is his last chance and expect him to do everything he can to get the Dutch to the finals.

Rafael van der Vaart: If he ain't injured, which at the moment has been rehabbing an ankle for the last 2 months, he can be the player that organizes the attack and leads the Dutch up the field. A very good passer and very good at organizing opposing defenses into doing what he wants before sending a pass up the field for a goal. Hoping he gets healthy so he can lead the attack on the left side.

Forwards (3)
Robin van Persie: A surprise to be honest, most expected Kuyt to be probobly be starting, but all indecations now say it will be Van Persie. A very good winger for Arsenal, van Persie can twist defensemen left and right on the right side. Very good pace, good ball handler, not known for his scoring yet, will probobly tire after 60 minutes and be replaced with Kuyt.

Ruud van Nisterlrooy: Ah everyone's favourite horseface. Ever since his split in Man U, he has remained faithful to the Dutch and from all accounts seems ready to show Man U and the world why he is considered one of the best strikers in the world. While not the flashes player in the world, he knows how to get to the right spot at the right time. He also can deke you out with his offensive skills when he wants too, but again I state you would think so when you first watch him play.

Arjen Robben: The Chelsea player, and right winger of the team has been having injury problems for the last year. Only in the last few days has he finally shown the pace needed to play. A deft deaker, and able to pull the trigger when needed, Robben can create and handle the ball almost as good as any player in the game. Expect to see him running with the ball lots and getting open on his right side before he crosses the ball in the middle towards Ruud.

There you have it, anyways I haven't fully decided yet and if public opinion changes my view I may live blog the world cup Nederlands games in my Dutch perspective, depends if people wish to see me write in agony and joy. Against haven't decided, post a comment if you wish to sway me to blog, cause I will honestly do it on Sunday morning, may be theraputic for me in a way.

I live you now with a Crazy Frog video, that has come out just in time for the world cup. I do thank Jose for finding this, as always I'm in your debt.

World Cup Official Music Video

2006-06-08T20:13:00.000-05:00

Oh the world Cup,

It's coming, it's rolling in like the cold wet weather that seems to come every weekend in Ottawa nowadays. But alas, atleast this is more exciting then a cold wet rainy day. I'll be honest the Cup has peaked my interest to an ultimate high. I finally found out the main cup song today, took me a while to locate it, not sure why as once I found it, I found it everywhere, maybe it's me being a moron with the controls. Anyways here is the video below. I do like to point out a couple of things, firstly I'm slightly dissapointed in the song, it's not very German, yes I do realize it's a pop classical R&B style, which in a way signifies the culture of German music, which is very open to anything across the board. But I was half expecting some kind of heavy metal band to put something in, give it that extra little flavor, or bass beat that I could blast in my card. Instead i'm left with Il Divo and Toni Braxton. A reminder that none of these singers are German, I guess it is an international tournament, but again would have rather had a home grown singer from Germany singing. Anyways enough for that, I will be posting my thoughts on the Dutch a bit later tonight.

World Cup Guesses

2006-06-04T17:17:00.000-05:00

Yes because I feel like making a fool out of myself I'm going to take a guess at how the rest of the tournament is going to go based on the predictions that I've made. Shall be intersting if I'm even 1/4 right after this point. Enjoy making fun of me you pundits, I'll dance like Peter Crouch if I'm correct by 50%.

1A (Poland) vs 2B (England)
Score Poland 1, England 2 ... 50 dead, cause surely we will have another riot
1C (Serbia and Montenegro) vs 2D (Mexico)
Score Serbia and Montenegro 0, Mexico 0 Shootout Mexico 4 Serbia and Montenegro 2 ... They caught the 2000 Dutch disease
1B (Germany) vs 2A (Sweden)
Germany 2, Sweden 1 ... clearly I'm hoping for a proposed match coming into effect shortly
1D (Portugal) vs 2C (Holland)
Portugal 1, Holland 2 ... revenge from 2004, Deco doesn't get that goal in and Figo finally hits his last legs
1E (Czechs) vs 2F (Australia)
Czechs 1, Australia 2 ... apparently Hiddink put something in the water
1G (Swiss) vs 2H (Tunisia)
Swiss 2, Tunisia 0... the Swiss roadblock, no woman allowed to be seen by the Tunisians
1F(Brazil) vs 2E (Italy)
Brazil 1, Italy 1 Shootout Brazil 4, Italy 5... Italy has good target practice from switching sides in previous wars
1H (Ukraine) vs 2G (France)
Ukraine 1, France 3... Cause clearly France never wishes to go away

Quaterfinals
England vs Mexico
England 2, Mexico 0... apparently the Robot just keeps going
Germany vs Holland
Germany 1, Holland 2... The orange Nazi helmets come into full effect at this game
Australia vs Switzerland
Australia 1, Switzerland 1 Shootout Australia 3, Switzerland 4
The Socceroos thuggery ends with neutrality
Italy vs France
Italy 0, France 0 Shootout Italy 4, France 3
Apparently Italy heard that taking a bath gives for quicker movement and better health

Semifinals
England vs Switzerland
England 1, Switzerland 2 ... those woman ads are really paying off
Holland vs Italy
Holland 1, Italy 1 Shootout, Holland 5, Italy 4
Okay so I got my revenge finally

Finals
Switzerland vs Holland
Switzerland 2, Holland 3
Offensive soccer, and I would be a happy happy man, no more bridesmaid for me

Okay so yes somehow I called a Holland victory, though they could quite noteable lose out at anytime with the amount of injuries they have right now, but hey it's only fan being a Dutch fan to support the Dutch team

Enjoy the world cup, it's only 5 days away.

World Cup Group H

2006-06-04T14:57:00.000-05:00

Ah the final group, the final group to make a bad joke at, and well maybe incite some soccer errr football knowledge to those of you that don't really follow the game at all. But that doesn't mean I won't have some fun with this group, no really I'm going to enjoy poking fun at the poor saps in this one. Firstly you have Spain, part of the iberian failure, then you have Ukraine, which is still trying to find some nuclear energy. Then Tunisia, who are always busy doing well at world cups, or atleast qualifying for them, and lastly Saudi Arabia, which is usually a goalfest waiting to happen, for the other team that is. So let's go get some oil and solve that energy crisis that Ukraine has been facing ever since Spain espionage blow up there plant... yes that's right I blame Spain.

Saudi Arabia aka Oil and Goal Galore
Yup that basically sums up Saudi Arabia, lots of money, lots of goals to be scored on the lack of defense. Just to make myself perfectly clear, look at what Iraq did to them in 2005, not much has changed since then, or in the last 10 years for that matter.

So what should we expect then in the group phase, well how about another 3 and out for them, it's really simple, they just don't have the talent, and my theme of the Asian nations getting too many spots shows up here again, as this will be another disaster for Saudi Arabia. There one bright spot is the development of Yaser Al Kahtani who is slowly but surely becoming a very solid Asian player. But again, if you are betting oil on Saudi, expect to start giving it away

Spain aka Loads of talent, lack of wanting to play
Well here is loveable Spain, when I mean loveable I mean the biggest choke artists around, and to be honest, I wouldn't be surprised if they found a way this time around. They have been migthy quiet as of late, which is a first for me. Usually everyone is ranting about spain, they did qualify pretty well in a tough group with Serbia, and got there win at home, but then their lies the problem, they can't win away, and if the tournament was in Spain I would give it to them. Mind you the weather conditions may be good enough for them, not too warm, not too cold in Germany at this time of the year, maybe a little too wet, but that's cause they like to whine.

With Raul, Torres, Xavi and Iniestra the Spanish have a chance to do really well, but if history tells us anything, and for the most part it's usually correct the Spanish won't win the tournament and will find some famous way to implode.

Tunisia aka We roll right through Africa
Okay here's the team that will qualify for the round of 16, it's their time to surprise the world and be the team that every bandwagon jumper will cheer for. With the fact that they are from Africa, and I've been unable to pick a team, I'm glad to finally make my selection. The player Santos will be a dangerous young individual, who posses a knack for getting the ball into the net. Ali Boumnijel the 40 year old keeper will be the 5 oldest player to ever play in Germany, while he is long in the ears, he will be able to make up with his talent of saving the ball. So while I won't beat this horse to death, expect big things from the nation known as Tunisia, they will do what Turkey can't do this world cup.

Ukraine aka Radiation makes us stronger
Two words: Andriy Shevchenko

Yes the man is dynamite, even on a bad ESPN commercial, and with that expect him to come flying into the world cup. He's a goal scorer, and probobly the most profilic one around right now, yes big words I use, but the Ukraine would not be in this tournament without him. That being said though, the Ukraine showed alot of balls by being the second team to qualify for the tournament and actually showed us, that they can in fact play soccer as a team and have more than this the Sheva to push them through. Serhiy Rebrov will be in charge of getting Sheva the ball and expect alot of counter attacking football from this squad. Alot like how they qualified for the world cup in the first place. Counter with Sheva and you can win. As long as the radiation treatments keep going they have a shot of being a big surprise and going far in the tournament.

Predictions
1. Ukraine
2. Tunisia
3. Spain
4. Saudi Arabia

World Cup Group G

2006-06-04T03:19:00.000-05:00

Ah get those bars of soap up it must mean we are on to unclean Frenchman, with there pastries and loads of hair. But they do get to have a chocolate bath in the group. As the Swiss are always happy to supply the chocolate, and apparently the woman in this world cup... yeah more on that advertisement campaign later. Also those pesky, buying refs, quick witted Koreans are back again to give us some Park action. And to end the group off, why not some colonization by the French with Togo. Yes they found there slaves as well, as it was neatly pointed out to me by my Portugeuse counterpart. So lock up your wives so they aren't swindled buy some pickpocketing Korean who is visiting Togo.

France aka We surrender
Well they have to get the old guards back for this world cup qualification. Apparently without them France will play every game to a 0-0 draw. Sadly Ireland decided to screw up and let them win away which allowed France to qualify for the world cup. I was quite dissapointed as I was hoping not to have make any bath jokes, or what is a bar of soap jokes for my france pals. But alas here they are, with the old guards of Zidane, Henry, Viera and Makelele back for another ride. It was expected that only Henry and Makelele would have been back for this tournament, but some guys just can't give up and want to repeat glory. Hate to say it though, France is too old, too slow and won't end up winning the world cup. It's not there time, and the tournament is not being hosted in your own country. While I do expect them to cause trouble as they are France, I expect them to scurry with there tails behind there legs when they decided to only play up and down the field and forget about working the wings, as only Henry has the speed to break and defense up.

Korea Republic aka the south part owned by the US
Well Korea is back for another round of qualification, again it has something to do with that easy Asian qualification. But to be fair the Koreans are in a great mood, cause well they could get out of this easy group. The problem though is, they like Hiddink and their fans to get them to the next round this time. There friendly schedule as of late has been pretty easy, but in that time they have managed only 1 win, and a load of draws and a loss today, so really I don't think this is the same team that we saw in the previous world cup. Park the Man U striker will be in top form and should be able to get alot of goals against Togo. My fav. defender in Lee, will be all over the park like he usual is, causing a disruption, not the best defender, but great at streaking up the wing and creating chances. In the end Korea will have to hope for some US artillery to get through the group phase in Germany.

Switzerland aka we will take care of the woman during the world cup
Yes here comes the greatest ad campaign of all time, or the most freak, click here to watch and scream if you have a wife. But that's not the only thing that Switzerland has going for them this world cup. They get to play France again, like the teams haven't seen enough of each other, it's actually developing into a Czech vs Dutch rivalry, which is always good for those neutral Swiss. The Swiss had to play a play in game to qualify against the Turks, which ended in a brawl at the end of the game, and sadly for the Turks a 5 game ban from playing at home and atleast 500 miles from the country, or was it 200, I forget, but that's not a pretty ban. The Swiss got through without much of a penalty, except for a suspension to one of their players. The Swiss are lead by their striker Alexander Frei who has been on fire as of late, scoring goals with reckless abandonment, someone should tell him he's supposed to score for both teams for the games to stay neutral. With a midfield of Vogel, Cabanas and Wicky the Swiss will have the veteran leadership they need to go far in the tournament.

Togo aka How did we qualify
Yes my fav. African nation this world cup has to be Togo. Just because they have such low expectations, the team somehow qualified for the world cup by knocking out expected group winner Senegal. So what expectations do we have now of this African nation, how about just getting a goal would be a good first logical step for this team. If they can come out of this tournament with a goal and even a point it will help them out. The country is in an uproar and proud that their nation qualified, suffice to say though they don't expect to win the world cup as this may be the weakest team of the bunch that qualified. In the end they are just glad to be here and hopefully can do some damage. Emmanuel Sheyi Adebayor will be expected to bring that much wanted goal to the Togo nation, he was the important striker that brought the demise of Senegal. So if they do win a game I will have to go purchase a Togo jersey and jump on the bandwagon with everyone else.
This is all that Togo needs to do...

Predictions
1. Swiss
2. France
3. Korea
4. Togo

World Cup Group F

2006-06-03T14:50:00.000-05:00

Ah yes group Brazil, or as I like to call it, the group of we just want to finish in second place, that's all. It should be known that this Group is actually group F, but the fact that everyone suspects that well Brazil will just win it and therefore should be known as the dogfight for 2nd place. And that dogfight will be taking up by those pesky kamikaze Japanese, the criminal minded Aussies and the loveable checkered Croats for that beautiful second place behind Brazil. With that in mind in should be noted that Brazil could actually lose, I will state that I don't expect them to win the world cup, my reasons are strange and have nothing to do with the talent of the team. Firstly, Brazil does not normally win back to back championships, it's every 8 years for them, secondly they are on European soil, normally a place they don't do well, wait till South Africa and I will proclaim them the champs.

Australia aka I really really hate them right now
Here we go with a criminal look of Australia,
Guus Hiddink is the coach for the moment for the Aussies, basically he ability of getting teams to the world cup and passed the group stage is remarkable, Dutch in 98, Korea in 2002, maybe it's the Aussies turn in 2006. The friendly that the Aussies played against the Dutch today it's been shown to me that they play a tough brand of soccer, followed by the expectations that they must injure atleast 3 players in each game... okay so maybe I"m being harsh, but this is part of my mental stimulation to get over the fact that my healthy team is definetly no longer healthy. Mark Schwarzer has been looking like a man possesed in net, and well he may be able to keep the ball out of the net for the most part until you face Brazil. Tim Cahill the Everton midfielder, has been playing superbly as of late and is the natural leader of the Socceroos. Expect to see Harry Kewell as the goal scorer for the Aussies, who will have to grind out wins with there physical play against the quick opposition that they will face in there group.

Brazil aka too much talent
What can I possibly say about Brazil that hasn't already been said in the news, oh well I could go on a story about a Brazil girl that I saw one day and ... okay I digress from that story, it's not a very good one, but I thought I would try and see if I could get it too work. Anyways the Brazilian squad is stacked like it always is, stacked like alot of Brazilian woman that you see on the beaches of Rio, stacked like... oh sigh I'll shut up not before I put my food in my mouth. Okay so on the soccer facts about the team. Firstly they have an allstar goalie in Dida, the man can get hit by a flare and still be relatively okay, so everyone must bring flares to Germany and throw them at him, in an attempt to phase him, I'm leaving Italy with that task. Secondly defense might be their weakest point, but man do they still have some offense back there, with a back four of Cafu, Roberto Carlos, Juan and Lucio, anyone one of those four could jump up into the attack. Thirdly, the midfield, ummm okay so Emerson is hurt and might not play, that's fine plenty of one namers to replace him, you'll have Ronaldihno, Kaka and Ze Roberto. In the front line you can have the most disgusting striker list ever, Adriano, Ronaldo and Robinho. So there you have it one disgusting list of players, I digress now and remind everyone that they won't win the world cup this year.

Croatia aka Checkmate
Okay so another bad joke about there jerseys, but really I can't get over them, they are just so entertaining to look at and well in the end Croatia is an entertaining team. Croatia a relatively young country, part of that wonderful split up of those eastern nations, has had a relatively good time at the world cup, with a 3rd place finish in 98 and qualifying for 2002, though they did bow out in the first round. Croatia finished ahead of Sweden in the group stage for this qualification and look to be a well rounded team. With striker Ivan Klasnic and Dado Prso providing the offense expect to see the Croats to be able to give every team a good run for there money at the world cup. Dario Simic will be called to provide the leadership for a relatively young Croats team that is still growing into becoming a European powerhouse. They may not be able to replicate the problems they caused for opponents in 98, but slowly but surely the Croats are coming.

Japan aka Asia makes it easy to qualify
Ah yes those small tiny skinny people of Japan. There ability to run for 90 minutes and not get tired is amazing, while the skill level is still improving maybe the fact that they won't have the pressure of the home fans will give them to ability to qualify for the next round, or wait, maybe not, isn't home fans supposed to help. Mind you Japan works in the opposite, first you pick a fight on Pearl Harbour, then you kamikaze, then you refuse to surrender, then one big bomb is dropped and you are forced to surrounder, now you are really good friends with the US. Oh how 50 years have changed, even the Russians haven't warmed up to the States like Japan has. But enough about the culture, how about the team. The team is in it's prime with most of them in the 26 to 29 range for age. Perfect time to have a coming out party, right, wait reminder Japan works in the opposite, they will need a young youth, or a bunch of 36 year olds to qualify. Basically what I'm getting at here is that I don't suspect Japan to do that much this world cup, they had there chance and Korea stole the spotlight from them. Expect alot of goals from Japan when they play Brazil, meaning lots of goals for Brazil and a few for Japan as they don't play a defensive style at all... which by the way is a nice thing, but some defense would be better.

Predictions
1. Brazil
2. Australia (I'm going with the socceroos as a voodoo spell so that they don't do well)
3. Croatia
4. Japan

World Cup Group E

2006-06-01T18:55:00.000-05:00

The second group of death, and is just as evil as the Group of C, with 3 high profiled teams in the Czechs, Italy and USA and an African intrigue in Ghana. So you ask what can we expect from all these teams, well you can expect them to choke, as they have all been able to do that before in wonderful fashion in the last 10 years. You can expect some pretty good defensive soccer, and if any of the top 3 teams really wanted too we might actually get some offense. Yes this is the group of boredom, it's a tough group but I don't know if any of the top 3 teams are actually going to want to score goals, they never really have wanted to in the past. So let's hit up Mussolini in Prague like we are an American unibomber beating up on an African nation.

Czech Republic aka We like FIFA rankings
Yes #2 in the world, somehow, yet they didn't win there group, nor have they won anything since they became there only little republic, so apparently FIFA has alot of explaining to do, how can this team be #2, ah well guess you just have to go with the flow. Ah the Czechs, so very excited for this tournament, alot like Euro they also got a bad group, having to face Italy and the USA is never a good thing, add some injuries and you got a full blown chance at screwing up. But I don't think the Czechs will do that, it's the last ride for Nedved, Koller, Smicer. Also Milan Baros as long as he is healthy could be the golden goal winner if the Czechs can go a long way. Which is possible, it's always been said that getting a tough group to start with is best for the later rounds, as you'll be prepared to play tougher opponents.

Ghana aka we screwed South Africa
Yes that's right those loveable Ghana folks, talked about quite quietly to start off the whole world cup, then even had to win a premiliminary game firstly to even qualify for the group stage of the African qualification. But they did that, and then went on to beat South Africa and end up the leaders of Group 2 and on to the glorious world cup. Problem though, they got stuck into a terrible group, I don't really suspect they will be able to win any games, mind you they do get to play Italy to start the tournament and that always means a possible vitory as Italy loves it's slow starts. Because I don't know much about Ghana soccer I thought a video depicting the team would be good.

So I have to admit I like Ghana fans, they all dress up in the country flag, very appropriate, very soccer fanlike. So when in doubt I'll cheer for Ghana in this group.

Italy aka Pesky Spitters
Ah the loveable Italians, which I will never really say there name properly, yes practice makes perfect, but only when you practice the right way to say the name, which clearly I've avoided for a good portion of my life. Anyways the Italians have an actual good chance of winning the world cup this year, and honestly say that while hating the way Italy has played soccer. Why you may ask, well it's really simple, Italy has always had some wonderful offensive players, but for some reason they choose to avoid doing that and put 10 guys in their own box and play for a 1-0 victory. It's the problem with the Italian league as well, never about free flowing football, all about grinding out a 1-0 stinker of a game. Just to show you that they can score goals, please look at the following video.

USA aka We need a nickname

Ah nothing says support like Dutch support and a Dick Cheney shooting joke. Anyways here we are, the good old US of A. Well they were good in 1998, when they finished last. A little upset at how well they did in 2002, but hey I guess Portugal is still angrier. Anyways to be honest I really don't know how the USA will do this year, they friendlies games haven't gone over that smoothly, yes I realize they are friendlies, but clearly they aren't up to par with other countries right now in terms of soccer. So with that in mind I will be one of many to proclaim that the USA won't make it to the next round. I just can't see it, if they were in an easier group they could have pulled it off, but Italy and Czech are two top soccer nations. But alas you'll be able to tell after their opening game against the Czechs if I was right, or all the USA fans were right.

Predictions
1. Czechs
2. Italy
3. USA
4. Ghana

World Cup Group D

2006-05-29T10:52:00.000-05:00

Ah Group D where we are sure to find free condoms and a few machetes at the world cup and as always a few expectations that will collapse to the grounds, faster then I can say You're with me Leather. Group D is full of surprises and epic failures, you have Mexico, Portugal, Iran and that little African nation known as Angola, which by the way have the best flap of the world cup. Any flag that can have the following descripition will automatically win in my books: "A golden star, part of a cog wheel and a machete is centered. That symbol is said to be inspired by the hammer and sickle, and represents industrial and agricultural workers. Yellow is symbolic of the country's mineral wealth, and red and black are said to stand for "Freedom or Death". With this is mind, let's go and see what each country has too offer, will they all fight for freedom, or will they all mess up and die and have another epic failure.

Angola aka Colonizational Revenge
Yup that's right, after beating out Nigeria to qualify for the world cup, they've managed to get into the perfect group for themselves, they get to go after those slavery pundits from Portugal. Sure Angola was colonized by Portugal when Portugal actually had land and the sea (now they are just stuck surrounded by Spain). But you need to remember that people don't forget who was in charge of them previously, it's alot like Darko playing the Pistons, sure they screwed him over and he might not become as good as everyone first thought, but it doesn't mean his A game is brought to them when he does play them. So this is why the June 11th match of Portugal vs Angola is a biggie, considering that Angola is playing in one of the weaker groups. Yes Portugal and Mexico are top quality football programs, they do have a tendency to start really slow, eh Portugal, must I remind you of greece.Akwa and Mantorras will be expected to put the ball in the goal, and it will needed to be done often with the way the Angolian defense has been playing lately. Yes you beat a bunch of German stiffs 5-3, reminder you still let in 3 goals, ah well I just can't wait to watch them play.

Iran aka nuclear warfare tactics
Have they been kicked out of the tournament yet, I just keeping waiting for it to happen, considering a bunch of UEFA teams have been trying really hard to get rid of them. Also don't expect and Red Light district for these boys, they won't be seeing and woman flesh until they find a way to make it to Canada and get through the easy immigration laws. Yes that's right I said it, Canadian immigration is pretty lax, but so is gaining diplomatic immunity as well and since i'm feeling really good right now, so is making the bomb, or nuclear weapons, everyone has such great success with it, too bad they are useless since no one will use them anytime soon. As for the Iran soccer team they will be busy attempting to survive the rigors of playing without woman, or more for the fact trying not to choke on any large objects at the world cup. Okay so they've won the Asian Cup a number of times, and were first in their division to qualify for the worldcup, but we all know that when they come to this tournament they get beaten up like a Saudi Arabian sidekick. Yes expect to see a couple 5-0 games when they play, may I mention that it won't be them doing the scoring.

Mexico aka the maya empire
Ah bring on the Mexicans and all the dirty mexican jokes that come with it. If I lived in the States i could use the whole immigration problem, but frankly it's not a problem here in Canada, we invite everyone in to take over our jobs, our schools and just about anything that no one wishes to work except garbage men, they always seem to be white. Now I disgress to soccer, the Mexicans have played alot of friendlies lately, and only have lost recently to France in a 1-0 dull affair somewhere in Paris. But really this Mexican team seems to enjoy 1-0 affairs, as they don't really have that much scoring power, while they do have the powerhouse in Borgetti, they do not have much else which may be a problem for them later on in rounds. As for the opening round, getting by 1-0 each game should work. It will be an interesting match when they play Portugal as that will probobly decide who plays the winner of Group C and second place of Group C.

Portugal aka long greasy slave trading hair
Ah yes, the Portuguese people, wonderful folk, wonderful at soccer, wonderful at blowing up in a world cup and not getting out of the first round. Yes those guys, the USA is all dissapointed that they don't get to play them, like they did 4 years ago. But that's a whole other world cup and story. Portugal for the last 16 years, have been thought as a team that could go a long way, with the golden years almost behind them now, Figo, Pauleta and Ricardo all getting long in the tooth, the expectation is that this may be the last run for the boys. With the success of Euro 2004 and a very good qualifying effort, it could be expected that this may be there best chance yet to host the trophy in Munich, but then again when has Portugal ever made things easy for themselves, they had a chance to win Euro, and managed to blow it to Greece, twice. Anyways, expect to see there open offensive style of football at this worldcup, I pray to god that Deco doesn't destroy the Dutch hopes in the second round, or I may just lose it and remove all the furniture out of my room, through the window.

I leave you now with what many think is the greatest soccer ref of all time, sometimes I can't agree more

And just for entertainment purposes, this is what happens in a Portuguese soccer dressing room.

Predictions
1. Portugal
2. Mexico
3. Angola
4. Iran

World Cup Group C

2006-05-26T22:14:00.000-05:00

Greeting to the group of death,

Yes it's time to publish my thoughts on what my beloved Dutch could do and yes I'm taking a realistic approach to it. They got put in what alot of people are calling the group of death, or what I call the Germans way of trying to screw us over. But don't worry you haven't, if anything most Dutch fans are happy with the group as it has a little bit of everything and means they will have to play well in qualifying which can only bold well if we get through to the next round. So with alot of fanfare and some worriness let's go through each of the teams.

Argentina aka Brazil's bitch
Here we come from the southern part of south america, we travel all the way to Europe in hopes to find a way to win it all and be able to make fun of Brazil. Yes they are the 4th ranked team in the world, and in my honest opinion they should be ranked higher, and yes I truly like there team and am always scared to play them. That being said, I do believe the June 21st match versus Holland will determine which of the 2 teams will qualify for the next round. Firstly let's go over the history, and there is alot. Holland lost to them in the world cup in 1978, which we will remind everyone were the golden years of soccer. But we got our revenge 20 years later with probobly the best Dutch goal scored in world cup history and bounced them from the tournament. (to see goal click here). Also I'm happy to report Argentina fans already want to fire Jose Pekerman for some of the picks he made going into the world cup. Not picking Zanetti in alot of people's eyes is a big mistake, mine included. So here is where the problem lies for Argentina, they have a good midfield with Juan Roman Riquelme and Esteban Cambiasso lead the way. They have an excellent offense with Hernan Crespo and young superstar Lionel Messi. Then they have a pourous defense, and an okay keeper. And this is why I don't see them getting through, they will score and be scored on, and will have to learn how to get through Serbia and Montenegro's defense. Moving on...

Holland aka Clogs Central
Well since I've already made a huge post, I might as well go on a bit about the Dutch squad, who thankfully are keep cooler heads right now. They are playing like a team and this is because Van Basten is making the younger generation believe, his ability to deflect attention from the team and keep there heads straight so far has been very refreshing, also his ability to make the tough choices, like choicing Babel instead of Huntleer make me feel better. So expect the Dutch to go into a 3-4-3 formation. With Kujt and Robben on the wings and Ruud at center. The midfield will be Cocu at the back, Van Bommel, Van Der Vaart and Landzaat. With the defense as Gio, Boulahrouz and Jaliens. Don't be surprised to see him change to a 4-3-3 depending on how the friendlies go this week. The problem with hoping that Holland will get first and have an easy time with the group is that they won't do anything the easy way. They will screw up the first game, everyone will panic and they will just squeak through in time to get to the next round, forcing the usual high strung Dutch fans to not have to jump of buildings because there team didn't qualify.

Ivory Coast aka awwwww SHIT
Ah yes Ivory Coast and Didier Drogba central, yes the all important African striker has gotten himself and his team in quite a pickle with the group they are in. If you had looked at all the African teams this year, this would have been the team most people thought would go through to the Round of 16, instead, well shit son it looks like they will be hard pressed to get a win. But yes, they could always be the giant sleeper if they get taking lightly by the big 2 in Holland and Argentina, it shall be very interesting to see how Argentina does against them in the first game on June 11th, if they get a tie or win they have hope, because if that happens Argentina will be a sinking ship. But they will need to beat the Serbs, or score a goal against them if they do infact wish to bring African pride to this world cup.

Serbia and Montenegro aka Screw it we wish to be single named
Yes that's right, you have split up, and right in time for world cup time. But as much as I would like to think this might stop your Iron Clad defense (DRAGUTINOVIC, VIDIC, GAVRANCIC and KRSTAJIC.) I know in the end it won't sadly. This team looks very strong, with the fact they only let one goal in during the qualification stage and that was to Spain in Spain. Otherwise it was alot of 0-0 affairs for them. The way this team works is alot like Italy, put 9 guys in the box, get the ball out and counter attack using the explosive Kezman to hopefully win a game 1-0. It won't be pretty soccer, but then in the end the only pretty thing the S&M have are the number of fantastically beautiful woman they have coming out of there, cause it for sure ain't the men.

Predictions
1. S&M (they will squeak out with 7 points)
2. Holland (we find a way to screw the Argies)
3. Argentina (fire manager)
4. Ivory Coast (2010 hopefully)

World Cup Group B

2006-05-23T21:59:00.000-05:00

Two World War and One World Cup, dodaa, do daa, Two World Wars and One World Cup. Ah yes must be Group B, and England must be involved.

So without furthur ado, we must give the floor to some classy english chants

If it wasn't for the english you'd be krauts. If it wasn't for the english you'd be krauts. If it wasn't for the english, wasn't for the english, wasn't for the english, you'd be krauts.

RULE BRITANNIA! BRITANNIA RULES THE WAVES! BRITONS NEVER EVER EVER WILL BE SLAVES!

sigh I digress, just couldn't help myself there, it's just nice and ironic that firstly england is playing in german and secondly they are spending alot of time reminding english fans what they can and cannot do in germany. Clearly I think Germany is just expecting to end up playing England and after the mess that they will have to clean up with Poland they are trying to shed away the violence.

In other news we are talking about group B, and well I guess I should get going on that one. So here's go another hopefully predictable post, that predicts correctly.

England aka Embrace the world by starting a riot
Ah the english, well time to see how well they fail again this year, with the absence of Owen and Rooney, or the fact that they won't be 100% yet, Sven is going to have to rely on lanky, Darko like Peter Crouch to score the goals, unless he moves Gerrard up which is specualted. Anyways anyway you look at it, the England team looks solid. With pylons like Rio and Sol at the back, it will take more than a truck to move them out. And yes expect to see the English in either a 5-4-1 or a 4-5-1, so basically Italy soccer at it's finest. I"m pretty sure right about now I've offended everyone that could possibly be reading this post. So I'll just stop right there and say, well the English are good, but they will find a way to screw up, may the soccer riots prevail.

Paraguay aka Hoping for Santa to be okay
Ummm, yes, injuries to your star striker, that seems to be a regular thing in this group, and in Paraguay's point of view they are no exception to the problem. Hopefully Santa Cruz will be ready, and not having knee troubles like he has been lately. Though the Paraguain's did qualify in 4th place in the always tough South American tryouts, don't expect too much from this team with out there star striker, they could sneak a win over England or Sweden, but otherwise I don't know if I can rely on them to pull up an uber upset, ah well, just glad to be there, it's not like Canada is.

Trinidad & Tobago aka it's an island party
The only team from a small island, and the smallest population to qualify for the world cup, and no Japan doesn't count, while this is great news I'm still mad at them. You ask why, simple they beat out Bahrain to qualify, all I wanted was to see Bahrain merchandise being sold for the world cup, now I'm left with TnT. Which means I must post the TNT video by AC/DC to enjoy seeing them in the world cup.

Ah now that makes me feel better, now this is the first time for them to qualify for the world cup and hopefully they can put up a good showing, I suspect they will be a bundle of nerves in there opening game, but hopefully Stern and Yorke can score a few goals so that the island nation can party like never before.

Sweden aka Sven's pocket rockets
Yes that's right, Sven is done in England and well he gets to play his home nation in the world cup, and that has never ended well for England. So luck is out and about that I shall expect to see a usual impressive performance this time around. Anyways if we have to talk about Sweden, we need to talk about Zlatan Ibrahimovic and the fact that this guy can do things with gum that I can't even do with a freaking soccer ball. Watch the said video from Nike and you will understand.

Need I say anything more, I think not, basically it's sick. The Swedes, who got beat out in Euro 2004 by the Dutch in PK's (I had to put it in somewhere), will be looking to bring there Ikea brand soccer everywhere, that means that the yellow and blue shirts will be out, and hopefully a few viking helmets as well. But yes the Swedes will be troublesome and fearsome, but well in the end, they have a few defensive liabilities to worry about first.

My Predictions

1. Sweden

2. England

3. Paraguay

4. Trinidad and Tobago

World Cup Group A

2006-05-19T15:39:00.000-05:00

mmmm World Cup time,

Yes I've started a post with the words mmmmm, sue me if you have to, if not just remember Oprah is always watching out for our safety. But yes the World Cup is only weeks away now, the excitement is building, the rosters have been set for all the teams, and the EU is still trying to get Iran kicked out because someone forgot to tell them that the Holocaust indeed did happen.

So with the time indeed closing in, 18.5 days till kickoff it's time for me to start rolling out my predictions of who will get out of each of the groups, and hopefully if I can annoy you just enough, a little blurb on each team, maybe something funny, maybe me just mocking the country, or maybe me saying we will win the world cup.

So ahoy, here we go, Group A, the wonderful group that gets to start this whole beautiful tournament off.

Germany aka the Krauts
Yes I said it, they are just a bunch of sausages, you don't like that eh do you mr. germany. Hope of repeating former success by winning the world cup at home, I hate to say it looks to be slim. While playing Germany at home can never be called any easy thing, the sad part this time around is that other than Ballack, Lehmann and Klose, the Germans don't really have very much other talent to go around.

While on a good note, it appears the Germans are very good with time, apparently they like to work with watches and even set up a day where are the players learnt how to make watches. I'm not sure if this was just a job training exercise before they get kicked out, booed by there country for the performance and sent to the nearest watch shop factory somewhere in Asia to make watches for pennies a day.

Costa Rica aka Thank goodness we play in Concacaf
Well here we are now, they have made it to the big show. They can pretend they are as good as Mexico right about now, as they have the same record before the show starts, doesn't mean that it will last thought, probobly far from it. It all comes down to if there national hero Mr. Paulo Cesar Wanchope can continue to show his gazelle like form and put some goals in against some tough defensive teams in the group. But when in doubt they can all go back to San Jose and party the night away. Cause just making the dance a second time in a row is good enough in the eyes of Costa Rica fans.

Poland aka We are paying you for mistreating us Germany
Get your riot gear out everybody, we are in for a show, and when I mean show I mean lots of rocks, sharp objects, urine bags and maybe the ever so pretty fecal shower to add a nice personal touch. Polish fans got exactly what they wanted, which was a piece of the Germans by being placed in this group. With the fact that both sides of a history of riotting, we shall look forward to hopefully a good showing in Dortmund June 14.

Otherwise Poland put a pretty good fight up in qualifying, ending up in the second spot just one point behind England. But other than the fact that most of the team ends with the last name ski or ek or z or j, their really isn't anything special about the team. They play as a team and that's how they got out of there qualification group in second place.

Ecuador aka can we please play at home
Yes Ecuador did finish 3rd in the South American qualification, but I hate to say it, they won almost everyone of there games at home, which is way above sea level, and lost or tied just about every game away from home, minus the vicotry against Bolivia. So let me be the first to say that Ecuador is in mighty trouble trying to figure out how to play at or near sea level air.

Look for them to struggle again, even with such a weak group this time around, yes no Italy or Mexico to beat them up this time around.

Predictions for the group
Well Apparently when Germany drew the groups they somehow managed to get the easiest one.
Expect to see the following order in finishing.
1. Poland
2. Germany
3. Ecuador
4. Costa Rica

Real reason why Senators lost

2006-05-14T21:44:00.000-05:00

Greetings,

To all Sens fans, I have found the reason you keep losing to teams that you shouldn't, it took a bit of research from back in the day, but I'm pretty sure I finally found out why you can't win certain playoff series. It has nothing to do with the team playing terrible defense, bad goaltending and a lack of scoring unless it's on a 5-3, and has everything to do with the political ways of Ottawa society.

So let me bring you to the attention of the real problem. It's the fact that Bob Chiarelli, who has been the mayor of Ottawa since the senators have been around, has a tendency to bet with other parties, in hopes of winning for once and taking home some free stuff to feed him and the rest of staff in Ottawa.

Exhibt A

Where it all begins, back in 1997 when the Sens for the first time in there history make the playoffs. It was a stunning moment in Sens history, but sadly it comes crashing to a halt pretty quickly. Bob Chiarelli didn't bet the farm right away, a smart move as the Senators were not expected to win the series. But after game 4 and with the Sens still very much in the series Chiarelli called the Buffalo mayor and proposed a bet. He bet some beavertails for some chicken wings from Buffalo. This is the ultimate reason that the Sens lost in game 7. With that Chiarelli had to send some BeaverTails which are a delicious hot pastry which are smothered in toppings such as Cinnamon, Chocolate and Apple.

Exhibt B

1998 comes rolling around and we are in the playoffs again, a low seed, but still in. We draw the Devils, Chiarelli smartening up from his previous bet last year doesn't bet. It's a miracle, we win, we beat the Devils, we get to move onto the next round. Well look we get the Capitals, they are a bit more beatable then the Devils should have been, Alfredsson is on fire, oh wait, Ottawa politics get in the way. This time Jean Chretien decides to make a bet with Bill Clinton. Flying the winners flag on there respective building. Well suffice to say the Senators lose and the Capitals flag goes up in Ottawa.

Exhibt C

Hey the Senators are a higher seed for once, well that clearly means are chances of winning are alot better this time around. Oh and look Bob Chiarelli goes and places a bet since we are playing the Sabres. He really wants those chicken wings, better get to work on that bet. Oh wait the Sens get swept by the Sabres, sadly Bob owes more beavertails to his friends down south. Does anyone see a slight pattern?

Exhibt D

2000 and 2001, we play the Leafs, Mel Lastman the mayor of Toronto is quite the salesman, makes Bob Chiarelli look silly attempting to sell how great his team is. So they make a bet, the Ontario rivalry builds, and frankly Ottawa loses both times. Poor Chiarelli actually has to put a Leafs jersey on while attempting to make very big decisions for the city.

Exhibt E

Well like all bets sooner or later you'll get a small payout at some point, and in 2002 it finally paid off. It's sort of like the casino, you win a small amount, entices you to play longer and in the end they get more money. Same thing with these bets, Chiarelli finally wins one and feels grand. The Senators end up beating the Flyers and therefore good old mayor Chiarelli wins some Tastykakes for his whole staff. Tastykakes are a Philadelphia snack staple available in an assortment of flavours from Butterscotch to Jelly Krimpets.
But clearly once you put your hand in the cookie jar, you just can't resist another bet. Well Chiarelli goes and bets the Leafs, you know the 3rd time is the charm, bound to win this time around. Again it's another bet with wearing a Leafs jersey, and flying the opposing teams flag on your flagpole if you lose. And the Senators lose to the Leafs and up goes the flag.

Exhibt F

Well 2003 was a quiet year, apparently the mayor in the Islanders area doesn't want to bet, we win. The Flyers one smarting from his loss the previous year doesn't look for a bet, and we win. The Devils are never a betting team, but we lose to them, and sadly can't fault Chiarelli or Ottawa politics, only at the fact that there seems to be little going on, which is basically the political term for thinking about doing something.

Exhibt G

2004 comes around, and well what can I say, another loss to the Leafs, I don't even feel like going on anymore. You have lost 3 bets to the same town, maybe it's time to change the apporach, but clearly that's not the case and again the Leaf flag goes up in Ottawa.

Exhibt H

Well this is the apparent year for the Sens to win the cup, the last hurrah, the last chance before the team will be imploded upon by a nuclear device known as you refuse to win as a team, go find a new team to play for. So we win the first round, clear as day, get throught the Lightning, slightly shaky start, but everything went smoothly in the end. Find out the Sabres are the second round opponent, okay so we have lost to them before, well maybe this is the year. I'm actually thinking pretty highly of the Sens, cause they actually played there hockey in the first round. Well just before game time I'm eating dinner, and magically who pops up on the tv screen during the news. Well none other than Bob "*%$@#)$" Chiarelli, and I'm sitting there, watching him with his Sens jersey, praying for him not to do it, don't say anything about a bet, wish the Sens well, move on with your life. And then he drops the bomb, starts to go in detail about his bet with the Buffalo mayor, and well I knew then and there, we were going to lose the series. Five games later and we are out, what a surprise.

Anyways case and point, some please remind Ottawa politicians to stop betting on the Senators, when you only have won 1 out of 8 times, you got to sooner or later think that maybe you are the reason why they lose.

In case you were all interested, poor Bob Chiarelli sure got schooled good on a prank call from a radio station in buffalo, read all about in in the link posted below
Ottawa mayor's Stanley Cup Scandal!

Alan Partridge

2006-05-14T20:31:00.000-05:00

Okay, the man, the artist, the divine comic, none other than the fictional character known as Alan Partridge (played by Steve Coogan). Yes the Brits have known him for a long time, and only now have I've been graced by the wonderful tool know as youtube on the net, which has allowed me to see why the Brits fancy this individual so much. The Alan Partridge character has been around for a good 15 years now and next year we are going to be blessed we apparently the Alan Partridge movie. This is almost as exciting as the World Cup coming out, I think a few parties will have to be hosted in his honour. Now here are a few clips from the man, so you get why I so enjoy him, maybe you will laugh at it as much as I have, I think i've watched most of the clips 20 plus times and never really tire of them.

1994 World Cup Soccer, highlights with Alan Partridge

1994 Sporting Season

Why Archers are deceitful according to Alan

Now I don't have overly much to say, other than the fact that the Brits are genuises with there comics. See they don't beeping overplay them, they build up the character, but they don't abuse it into the ground. Hence why Alan Partridge is still funny 15 years done the road and he isn't tired and used up. It's really a simple concept that the north american music industry might like to employ to safe some of there singers from getting that quick buck, posing in playboy, and dissapearing off the face of the earth once you marry some back up dancer.

Alas look out for the world cup previews and predictions coming up becore the start of the world cup, which means 21 days!!!

Jerry Springer the OPERA

2006-05-14T19:15:00.000-05:00

Yes the title is confusing, I'm writing a sports blog for the most part, but every once in a while something in society captures my attention. So let me start my little story, I was watching the Sens game on Saturday night (yes the one they lost, more on that some other time if I can bring making fun of Sens fan more), and well during the in between period phase, ala after Don Cherry I was looking for something to watch, and low and behold on the Bravo network is Jerry Springer, the Opera.

I'll be honest, I'm not an avid Jerry Springer fan, I'll watch it every once in a while to see what rednecked man cheated on his wife, with a fat chick or a sister or even a mother. Frankly Springer is able to find just about anything that you could possibly imagine, and even some that would never cross your mind if you thought about it for a million years.

So this is why I was staring at my tv screen watching this intently, I'm not one for musicals at all, frankly nowadays I try to stay away from them, things are staged andtry to force emotions out of you, rather than watching sports where you never really know if you team will win or lose on a certain night.

Here I was transfixed, listening to opera singers and those artists attempt to not laugh while signing something so commical and insane that I'm surprised that not one of them burst out laughing. Mind you I guess practicing the scene over and over again would knock out any funny parts of it. See again staged events. Anyways I watched and watched and watched, and really almost was tempted to miss the second period of the game watching the show.

But thankfully I reigned myself in, and had enough heart to change the channel, but I did watch more of it after the second period is done.

Now you may be asking why the world I'm talking about this, well it's pretty simple, who in the world has this genius of a mind enough to actually think of putting Jerry Springer out as a musical. Clearly I never thought it possible, and how do you write a script for that, it's like let's think of the worst possible hookups in the world of dating and put them together, and then let's find the worst possible person you can cheat in, and voila you have a scene in the movie. Also on that point, who in the world gives the money to produce this, and how do you propose this to a board of executive stiffs. Do you go with the following: Do you like redneck hillbillies who cheat on there significant others? Do you feel like more swearing is needed in the world? How about a play on religion, and especially Christanity and we can get alot of people to complain and therefore garner attention. Honestly I would have loved to be there to watch that meeting go on, but alas I didn't get a chance to be.

Anyways if you want to watch something entertaining, maybe you have a wife or a girlfriend, or a boyfriend, or a husband that loves the arts and they love watching operas and you want to make a silly point and watch something that will not really make you think but atleast it's tolerable to sit through. Go buy, rent, or wait for it's return on Bravo, cause I'm sure it's rantings went up when I started watching.

Until again I leave you with a song from the movie and a randomly spliced video of other videos and dancing, probobly best if you don't like swearing to not watch the following video.

Hup Holland

2006-05-14T13:37:00.000-05:00

Finally

The world cup is almost near, and thankfully the teams are now being named, and with that I give my preview on the Dutch team that was named today by the great Marco Van Basten, who lead us to glory in 1988 at the Euro championships. While most names were known before today, Marco was able to delight us with a few selection and force us to wonder why he overlooked others, but that is sports, it brings to us great debates on selections, and allows us to socialize with others by talking about this. So in the grand scheme of things, sports and this selection process provide us the means to communicate with other people, which in the end can lead us to network and in general learn something.

So here's the line up

Keepers: Edwin van der Sar, Maarten Stekelenburg en Henk Timmer

No Surprise here at all, to be honest Edwin van der Sar is the leader of this team this year. The only person close to as much experience as him is Cocu, this could be his final world cup and the last time he will be able to lead the Oranje, he has all the skills and experience necessary to bring this team. Henk Timmer has been the shadows for a while, and maybe he will get his chance soon enough, for now him and Stekelenburg will just have to learn from the savy veteran, with the way he keeps his defensemen in order.

Defenders: Khalid Boulahrouz, Giovanni van Bronckhorst, Tim de Cler, Johnny Heitinga, Kew Jaliens, Jan Kromkamp, Joris Mathijsen en André Ooijer

Barry Opdam might be just about the most notable selection left off this roster, to be honest I was very surprised, he proved himself for the national team with the way he played in the qualifying round, and it was a bitter blow to him that he didn't make it. At the same time though he is an extremely small centerback and with playing the big Serbs, and having to be able to contain Drogba, Van Basten seems to have thought that the big his defense the better. He at one point had attempted to even pursue and get Jaap Stam back (yes that Jaap, you penalty kick misser). So I see his logic, but at the same time I don't understand why he picked Mathijsen or de Cler, they have done very little for the national team and were the surprise choices of this group. Look for a back four that consists of Gio, Boulahrouz, Heitinga and Kromkamp.

Midfielders: Mark van Bommel, Phillip Cocu, Denny Landzaat, Hedwiges Maduro, Wesley Sneijder en Rafael van der Vaart

Well no real surprises here, other than the fact that Davids was kept off the team. Mind you that's probobly for the better in the end, he's a very talented player, but has caused a few tiffs with the team. Hopefully van der Vaart will be fit enough in time for the world cup. To some it was a surprise to see Landzaat on the squad, but his ability to play well during the qualification stage and his ball movement made him an easy selection. If the Dutch have a strength it's going to be the play of there midfielders, they have the ability to place and of the 6 guys in there and have them move the ball around without a problem. Look for the start 3 at midfield to be Cocu, van der Vaart and van Bommel.

Forwards: Ryan Babel , Dirk Kuyt, Ruud van Nistelrooy, Robin van Persie, Arjen Robben en Jan Vennegoor of Hesselink

No Klaas Jan Huntelaar, after so much speculation that he was going to get a spot over the greatest last name in sports; Vennegoor of Hesselink. Also the fact that Babel got picked over McKay was a surprise, but in the end it should have been expected. Realistically you now have 3 to 4 guys that can play the wing in : Babel, van Persie, Robben and Kuyt. You also have your two bangers as I like to call them (Ruud and Vennegoor of Hesselink). Expect to see a starting line up of Kuyt and Robben on the wings with Ruud in the middle. Around the 70th minute you will probobly see either van Persie or Hesselink, depending on what the Dutch need at the time. I do like the Babel pick, not only will it allow him to gain some experience, he may just crack the lineup in the end. There has been a lot of talk from people that he is the next big Dutch superstar and if anything he may just break out like Robben did at Euro 2004.

In closing right now, I'm very happy with the squad, lots of youth, with just enough veteran talent to keep everyone on track and go for the goal of winnning the world cup. Van Basten has put all his cards on the table with going with a youth lineup, and if it doesn't work he will be the one to take the blame, but so far he hasn't done badly and I will continue to agree that he is going in the right direction. Actually seeing smiles on the faces of all Dutch players in training camp is quite the accomplishment, hopeful they can play as a team and show the world what total football is all about.

Hup Holland

The Patrolling Force

2006-05-12T21:26:00.000-05:00

Howdy,

Well time to get this blog going, I avoided doing this at one point in my life, but being the young grasshopper that I am, i've become greedy and decided that if people do read this it's for their own good, maybe they will pick something out of interest with what I write. If not, I don't really want to hear about it at all, this is like Allan Iverson and practice, I'm not going to sit here talking about my blog sucking, this doesn't help me or my blog and doesn't help anyone in the long run.

Here I am, patrolling the right from wrong, right near the iberian border, well I lie about that, but frankly I guess I should post at why I chose the name iberian border hup, when this has very little to do with any borders. Firstly the iberian is from the grassroots of my life in university, if it wasn't for two certain roommates I wouldn't be as knowledgable in some sports as I would have liked to be, and vice versa. As I see fit one lived in the iberian area, and the other one uses the iberian reference way too often. Secondly the Hup, which in Holland means Go, very simply concept, I'm a Dutch soccer enthuist and frankly anytime I say Hup it's usually followed by Holland. I just like the word and it drives me to learn Dutch so maybe one day I can past one of those blantly hard immigrations tests in Nederland. Finally the Border comes simply from the fact that I am Canadian and share the longest border with the States, they seem to have a sense that they need to put a border patrol everywhere, while Canadians are a little pessismistic towards the idea. So there you go, that's the last time I will mention why I named this blog the way I did, maybe it will change, but for now I kind of like it.

Okay Sens Talk

Cause really I doubt I will make another post in time to talk about them again this year. Yes I'm not a Senators fan, doesn't mean I won't cheer for them when they play against certain teams, but it's vice versa when they play teams I like.

Well let's begin, with the usual plot line, Ottawa is favored to win series, Ottawa finds way to screw up and lose... that's the basic premise of what the Senators do in the playoffs. Now there is a couple of reasons for that, and I'm not going to harp on specific players, oh wait I may have too.

Firstly: 9 years, 4 times you were favored to win the conference, and yet you still haven't managed to get out of it, frankly for a second there I thought we had a Babe Ruth curse in Ottawa, but then what history do we have where we could possibly have a curse, it's not like Ottawa has ever traded any big name player away (Hossa doesn't count, you got value in return).
Secondly: Watching them play this second round, is like attempting to watch Spain play offensive soccer, for some reason someone told them they were on national tv, or that the whole country was behind them. What happened to spreading yourselves out, getting traffic in on net, passing the puck on the proper stick. It's playoff hockey, not the cirque du soleil, stop making those stupid behind the puck passes. Don't come down the ice in a straight line, then decided to bunch up where any border patrol member could snare the whole lot of you with a freaking net.
Thirdly: Traffic in front of the net, it's been a problem forever and it continues to be a problem, get in front of the freaking net, create havoc, create traffic, it's like Neal needs to be pissed off at the goalie to get in front of the net. I don't understand it and never will understand it.

Anyways I could rant on for a while, but I choose not to, on the basic premise that in about 24 hours the team will be out of the playoffs and done for and I can hear all the whining about how if Hasek was ready the cup would be Ottawa's. Frankly that's not going to happen in the next 25 years so why worry about it, more on this later.

World Cup 2006
Oh yes it's that wonderful time, only 26 more days till I cut away from doing any substantial work and spend my time in front of a tv, watching the greatest tournament on the face of the planet. I'm pretty sure that I'll be drinking beer, watching soccer, eating a sausage, wondering when and were the Germans will lose and be out of the tournament.

Yes the lineups are slowing coming out for all 32 teams in the tournament, and the Dutch have a few choices to make, they are busy at there training camp right now, and it shall be interesting to see who makes in onto the final 23 man roster. I'll write alot more on this later, hopefully I'll blog the tournament as I watch it for anyone to read my thoughts during some praticularly tough times in my life.

Around enemy lines
Firstly I have to get this out of my system, whatever crazy whacko came up with the idea that OJ Simpson should have a one hour episode called Juiced, where he goes pretending to punk random strangers, is a complete genius. I may actually pay to watch that episode, only for the fact I was to see him hustle selling a Bronco to some poor stranger.
You're with me Leather: Yes the reference of the year, congrats Chris Berman on deciding to more than likely cheat on your wife, unless your relationship is alot like AK47 and his wife, then I understand you were just using your get laid once a year pass. But I will give you credit, solid pick up line there, I swear if I ever see a girl dressed in all leather and I'm some famous sportsbroadcaster, I will go and use that line, I'll even by the shirt and have it all lined up so the girl knows I'm going to be saying that line to her.
Bob Cole and Harry Neale: Enough is enough, i'm tempted to spend a game writing there ridiculous comments down. I know announcing is a tough job, no worries I do it at the university level, but frankly it's getting a bit ridiculous already, I can't stand listening to them say the same things all the time, or frankly mess up the names every few minutes and then figure to move on and not apologize for saying the wrong person, when in the world did Spezza look like Chara, or anything near Chara, that's a name you should never ever ever mess up. But well then they are becoming old and senile and being placed on the 4th level of the Scotiabank place ain't helping there cause to see who is who.
Paris Hilton: Enough already, get off the bandwagon, stop talking about her, let her crawl back into her hotel room, and let her pick up the latest STD on the market, or for that matter help her spread some more around for the rest of the famous people to pick them up, but stop mentioning her, no one cares, no one wishes to know, and for the most part it's better if we spend as much time as possible away from her, oh wait I'll shut up now.

Final Notes:
-Reminder NBA playoffs are on, get your game face on Clippers, or Steve Nash is going to bitch slap you like it's his draft day photo
-NHL playoffs, the ongoing animal circus continues, yes I'm thinking we will have a Duck, a Shark, a Sabres and well mix in a weather pattern with the Hurricane
-Baseball, it's pink bat weekend, maybe the whole time A-Rod might actually feel comfortable about himself in the batter's box, pink dildo anyone?
-CFL, only a matter of time when marijuana is the way to sign players... hey Ricky did you hear that.
-The more times drunken broadcasters are put on air the better, let them talk, it makes baseball more interesting for Padres fans
-It's okay Jacques Villeneuve, some people just hate you enough that they drop your engine so that you can look bad too everyone, or maybe it's just they know your going to blow up your engine anyways so they took the time to ruin it for you before the race

That's it for now, border patrolling it since I became a fetus